Q: I love the idea of having my women waiting for me in bed dressed in leather and lace with a handful of rope. In reality, our sex is usually prompted by one of us having a shower before bedtime. Sure, I could leave out a mini skirt and pom poms by the bed, but I wouldn’t want her thinking I was going all Dazed and Confused on her ass and can’t stand the idea of having to listen to her “secretly” talking to her mother about it. How do I introduce the idea of role play into our relationship? A: You know what’s hotter than having sex with one person for the rest of your life? EVERYTHING! Role play isn’t just fun, it’s critical to a relationship’s longevity. It helps keep things exciting! Most women require mental stimulation to get aroused. Like when I’m watching a porno, I always want to hear the cheesy dialogue. I want to know how long the nurse has known the naughty patient. What is his income status? Does he have a girlfriend? How often does he get AIDS tested? What does he do with that ginormous cock when he’s riding a bicycle? Et cetera. Role-playing allows you to choose your own adventure while simultaneously enjoying the comfort of intercourse with your normal partner. What’s not to like? Wearing a costume can not only give you newfound confidence, it can also give you the freedom to do things differently in bed. If you wanna get your lady into something sexy, don’t hint around. Go out and BUY her something hot. But if she talks with her mother about her sex life, I think you might have bigger shit to worry about. Like her mom having a rough estimate of your penis size, shape and feel. Who are we kidding? She’s probably already seen pictures. Jenny Mollen is a writer, actress and all-around gorgeous sassy badass who lives in L.A. with her dog Teets and husband Jason Biggs. She writes about her life on TheSmokingJacket.com in her highly popular column What She Said. Follow her on Twitter at @JennyAndTeets and on Instagram at JennyAndTeets2. Check out Jenny's first column on watching porn.