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Australian Man Spends Five Years Fighting to Use Penis Doodle as Signature

Courtesy of [Jared Hyams/The Brisbane Times](http://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/national/melbourne-man-faces-stiff-opposition-to-penis-signature-20160106-gm0sx6.html).

Courtesy of Jared Hyams/The Brisbane Times.

Jared Hyams of Melbourne, Australia, feels he’s standing up for his legal rights. But government bureaucrats think he’s simply being a dick.

For the past five years, Hyams has been fighting to have a penis doodle (which can be seen in the following tweet) recognized as his signature on official government documents:

Initially, Hyams simply used the little doodle as a joke. But as time went on, the tiny penis expanded into something much larger:

“I thought it would be a laugh; [the Australian Electoral Commission] would approve it and next year I would sign something different,” Hyams told the Brisbane Times. “But when I did this signature all of a sudden the shit hit the fan. I was receiving letters and phone calls telling me I couldn’t have it. I thought, that’s interesting, why not?”

You mean besides the fact that there are no discernible letters corresponding to your legal name?

“What a signature is comes down to the function, not the actual form,” Hyams argues. “Generally, it’s a person putting a mark on a piece of paper by their own hand. As soon as you start defining what a signature is you run into problems - if it’s meant to be someone’s name how do we define that because most signatures are just illegible scribble.”

However, Australian magistrates don’t seem to agree. Hyams legal challenges have been dismissed as a frivolous waste of time since the doodle itself is easily forgeable and could “create uncertainty and confusion.” It was also pointed out that the drawing could violate sexual harassment laws.

However, Hyams did not give up his fight, and has managed to slip the doodle past government officials while obtaining both a drivers licence and a proof of age card. The fight also aroused Hyams’ desire to obtain a law degree, a process that should reach its climax later this year.

“It sparked something in me,” he said.

(Source: Brisbane Times)

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