Thursdays mean another episode of BattleBots, which is a mad blessing from space and I, like you, can barely contain my joy for machine mayhem. There’s just no scenario of robots fighting robots that isn’t awesome. I’m even including Real Steel and Rock’em Sock’em Robots in that theory. Hell, even portrayed as a parody of wrestling in cartoons, robot battles are still bitchin’.

So I of course thanked whatever robot gods clank above us for the return of BattleBots last year. The longer sophomoric season of the show’s revival, which kicked off last month, has given me all that I wanted. My inner child and the lanky sack of mystifying high cholesterol I became are both gleeful idiots for it. Honestly, the only thing that could make BattleBots better is if they were sentient and had MMA-like backstories and weigh-ins to trade barbs.

If you would like to join me and others dedicated to robo-specific schadenfreude, BattleBots gives America the safe robot wars we can adore without fearing at 8/7c on ABC.

Just get ready for this.

And this!

Anyway, I saw these two gifs from tonight’s episode, blacked out, and woke up with this article already written.