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10 Best Mascots in College Football

10 Best Mascots in College Football: Wikipedia

Wikipedia

College football and mascots go together like peanut butter and jelly. Since most stadiums don’t offer alcohol, the crowds can get pretty restless during the numerous stoppages in play that occur during a game. Good thing there’s always a student wearing a ridiculous tiger costume to dance around and give out high fives. To celebrate everyone’s favorite college football tradition, we’ve ranked the top 10 mascots in the sport.

Unfortunately, we still haven’t figured out if the people in the costumes are wearing pants under their suits.


Twitter, @Cenomobile

Twitter, @Cenomobile

Dishonorable Mention: The Tree
Stanford Cardinal
Technically, Stanford does not have an official mascot. But since “The Tree” is the mascot of the school’s marching band, it’s pretty much the official one for the school as well. And let’s face it: It’s horrendous. It looks like a parent wanted to make a Do-It-Yourself tree costume for their kid’s Halloween party, but forgot that they don’t have any arts and crafts skill.


Wikipedia

Wikipedia

10. Albert and Alberta Gator
Florida Gators
Florida Gators is a great team name. It promotes a popular in-state animal and also implies your school has a little ferocity. But in 1970, the University of Florida realized bringing live alligators around the country wasn’t necessarily the best idea. So they invented Albert, a walking alligator who wears sweaters and a hat. Then in 1984, they gave him a wife, Alberta. They’re a classic American couple, who also enjoy sleeping in swamps all day.

Why don’t more schools have mascot couples? Maybe if there were more depictions of stable relationships in college sports, hookup culture wouldn’t be as rampant on our nation’s campuses.


Wikipedia

Wikipedia

9. Big Al
Alabama Crimson Tide
While college football and mascots go together perfectly, elephants and Alabama do not. And yet, the University of Alabama’s mascot is Big Al, an elephant. Apparently in 1930, a sportswriter reported a fan yelled, “Hold your horses, the elephants are coming!” when the Crimson Tide took the field. However, it wasn’t until 1980 that Alabama actually introduced Big Al, who has now become an iconic mascot. It may be ridiculous that an elephant is the mascot of a football team in Alabama, but is it really more weird than a tiger wearing pants?

Fun fact: The school named him “Al” through popular vote amongst the student body. He was named after Al Brown, a popular DJ at campus parties in 1980.


Wikipedia

Wikipedia

8. Brutus Buckeye
Ohio State Buckeyes
The “buckeye” is the official state tree of Ohio whose leaves look suspiciously like marijuana. But, as mentioned above with Stanford, a tree is a stupid mascot. So when choosing a mascot in 1965, Ohio State students chose Brutus Buckeye, just a normal guy who wears a long-sleeve polo shirt, a hat and has an abnormally large head. He looks like he could be a character in Hey Arnold, which is a good thing. Mascots that are just real people are really lame. (Looking at, Notre Dame!)
Big-Red-Western-Kentucky
7. Big Red
Western Kentucky Hilltoppers
What is a hilltopper? Someone who climbs a hill? A flag that you plant at the top of a hill? No one knows. So there must’ve been some trouble picking a mascot when Western Kentucky chose for their team to be named the Hilltoppers. So they just made a Red blob that looks like Grimace from McDonald’s and called it a day. And it’s awesome! Who wouldn’t want to take a picture with Big Red?

Also, Western Kentucky sued an Italian television station for having a mascot that looked suspiciously like Big Red. His name was Gabibbo, and he looks like this:

Wikipedia

Wikipedia

That’s definitely Big Red’s long-lost, evil twin.

How many other mascots are getting stolen by European media companies? (However, Western Kentucky did not win that lawsuit.)


otto-the-orange-syracuse-univeristy

Instagram, @theottoorange

6. Otto the Orange
Syracuse Orange
Syracuse Orange is one of the worst name in sports. It’s like they were brainstorming a name, and just kept repeating “Syracuse” “Orange” trying to think of a good word to put after Orange, but never figured it out, so they just made that the name.

Despite being a terrible name, Otto the Orange is a terrific mascot. Why? No torso! Instead of giving him a weird cartoon-ish body, they just threw some arms and legs onto an Orange. With so many GMOs out there, it wouldn’t be too surprising in a few years if all oranges starting growing arms and legs as well.

But how does the person in Otto’s costume see? The eyes are two far apart for a normal human, and there doesn’t appear to be any eye holes in the costume either. That must be why he has a nose. If he’s ever about to run into something, the nose will absorb the impact.


Put your knowledge to the test and enter the Playboy College Football Championship presented by FanDuel for a chance to win cash, party with Playmates and experience the Playboy Mansion.


Wikipedia

Wikipedia

5. Puddles the Duck
Oregon Ducks
When ranking the best fictional ducks, Daffy and Donald are definitely at the top. Maybe you could put Scrooge McDuck in the top three, but following them is definitely Puddles. Puddles is a straight up gangster. He wears an awesome sailor’s hat and that fancy scarf. He doesn’t wear any pants, which is definitely mandatory for cartoon ducks. And his name is Puddles! What a perfect name for a duck. People always think way too hard on what to name their pets. Oregon absolutely nailed it with Puddles.


Hairy-Dawg-and-UGA-University-of-Georgia

RedAndBlack.com

4. Hairy Dawg and Uga
Georgia Bulldogs
Some schools choose to have a cartoon animal as their mascot. Others bring a live animal around to celebrate school spirit. Georgia is one of the few schools that has both, and they’re both pretty awesome. Hairy Dawg is great because he looks like a badass in his football jersey, he’s got those teeth poking out (so you know he’s got some bite!) and he’s just goofy enough that kids will like him. And his name is an excellent pun. It’s the only time spelling something “d-a-w-g” is acceptable.

Uga is a real life bulldog, which is great because bulldogs are the best dog breed. They always look like they’re smiling because their mouths are always open while they pant. They’re extremely friendly dogs that enjoy a good belly rub now and then. And you can put a t-shirt on them and parade them around a football stadium with nearly 90,000 drunk students in it and they don’t care.

It’s the best of both worlds.


Wikipedia

Wikipedia

3. Sebastian the Ibis
Miami Hurricanes
No, it’s not a duck. An ibis is a native bird in Florida that “is known for its bravery as a hurricane approaches. Folklore maintains that other birds look to the Ibis for leadership.” So apparently as a hurricane is approaching, other birds are losing their s@#t, and the Ibis is just chilling with a “IDGAF” attitude. That’s actually a pretty great idea for a mascot. Otherwise they would have to use a storm cloud or something, and that would be pretty lame.

There’s also something funny about a school that regularly recruits criminals and dirty players having a bird as a mascot.


Sparty-Michigan-State-University
2. Sparty
Michigan State Spartans
It makes sense why Notre Dame is the Fighting Irish. The Midwest, particularly Chicago which is nearby, has a rich history of Irish-American immigrants who identify closely with Catholic traditions. While we know about the number of Irish immigrants who came to America, it is less known that Michigan was at one point a hotbed of Greek immigrants. At the beginning of the 20th century, thousands of Greek people came to Michigan to work in Henry Ford’s factories and begin a new life in America. So it’s not completely ridiculous that Michigan State’s nickname is the Spartans.

Sparty, the Michigan State mascot, is a classic. Not only is he a tough warrior who wields a sword and dons armor 24/7, he’s also buff as hell. Look at that guy! His muscles are so big, they’re pushing through his armor. In real-life, that would probably make it harder to fight in sword combat. But considering his weapons are made of rubber, it probably isn’t a big deal.


Fighting-Okra-Delta-State-University

FearTheOkra.com

1. Fighting Okra
Delta State Statesmen
Here are some facts about Delta State University: It’s located in Cleveland, Mississippi (which does not bode well for its athletic success), about 3,300 students attend the university and they compete in Division II athletics. Also, they have the best mascot in college sports: the Fighting Okra. Watch some of these videos of the Fighting Okra:

The Fighting Okra is a psychopath who will put dangerous animals into a pool if you don’t swim fast enough. Here’s another:

If you goof off in class, the Fighting Okra will taze the s@#t out of you! He’s completely insane. Last one:

That’s right! The Fighting Okra will kick your ass if you eat okra. So instead of using their mascot to promote people to eat more okra, they’re using it to scare people from doing so.

The Fighting Okra is completely bizarre, is portrayed as a psychopath who terrorizes the campus at Delta State University and is undoubtedly the best mascot in college sports.


Put your knowledge to the test and enter the Playboy College Football Championship presented by FanDuel for a chance to win cash, party with Playmates and experience the Playboy Mansion.


Joseph Misulonas is the Girls co-editor for Playboy.com. He can be found on Twitter at @jmisulonas.

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