There’s a lot of important and interesting life lessons throughout the Bible. Or at least so I’m told. I don’t know. I’ve never read it. Have you ever seen a Bible? It’s longer than the Harry Potter books. Who’s got time for that? Luckily, one Facebook user made a status that perfectly sums up the Bible for those heathens who can’t be bothered to read the whole thing.

Congrats! You’re now eligible to enter the Pearly Gates.

Joseph Misulonas is an editorial assistant for He can be found on Twitter at @jmisulonas.