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13 Biggest “F*%# You”s In History

13 Biggest “F*%# You”s In History: Smithsonian

Smithsonian

Sometimes in life, you are placed at a crossroads where you have only two choices: compromise or give the other person the finger and tell them to shove it. Below are a few of our favorites from the people who chose the latter. Here are some of history’s biggest “fuck yous”:

1. Space travel, bitches

Putting a U.S. flag on the moon

2. #TBT Treaty signing

Hitler forcing the French to sign their surrender on the exact same train carriage the Germans forcefully signed their surrender in WW1 in.

3. Coincidence? I think not

Josip Broz Tito. He was the leader of Yugoslavia back in the 1940s (Up until his death in 1980). When Yugoslavia and Russia had a falling out, Stalin actually tried to have Tito killed, by sending assassins. After months of failed attempts, Tito wrote a letter to Stalin, saying: “Stop sending people to kill me. We’ve already captured five of them, one of them with a bomb and another with a rifle. If you don’t stop sending killers, I’ll send one to Moscow, and I won’t have to send a second.” Tito then went on to outlive Stalin by almost 30 years.

4. The balls on that guy…

The Chinese student who stood in front of a tank at Tiananmen Square.

5. Never challenge a tractor maker

Lamborghini’s wealth allowed him to cultivate a childhood interest in cars, owning a number of luxury automobiles, including Alfa Romeos, Lancias, Maseratis, and a Mercedes-Benz. He purchased his first Ferrari, a 250GT, in 1958. Lamborghini was fond of the Ferraris, but considered them too noisy and rough to be proper road cars, likening them to repurposed track cars. When Lamborghini discovered that the clutch on his Ferrari was broken, and was actually the same clutch that he used on his tractors, Lamborghini went to Ferrari and asked for a better replacement. Ferrari responded, saying that he was just a tractor maker, and could not know anything about sports cars. Lamborghini decided to pursue an automobile manufacturing venture.

6. This guy’s got some stones on him

Giles Corey. When accused of being a witch, the 81 year old farmer decided to say nothing. Knowing that any answer would result in his land being taken away and not left to his sons in law, he decided not to plead at all. In order to extract a plea from him, the sheriff had him lay in a pit with a board over his chest, with more heavy stones being added every hour. Giles Corey laid in that pit with stones on his chest until his tongue lolled out of his mouth. After two days of this torture, the old mans’ final words when asked for his plea were “More Weight.” His sons in law kept his land.

7. Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to

Cato had a gripe with Caesar for reading personal notes during senatorial meetings and accused him of being involved in some conspiracy, at which point he declared that if Caesar had nothing to hide, he wouldn’t mind sharing the contents of the letter. So Caesar hands the letter over and it turns out it was a love letter from none other than Cato’s half sister.

8. That’s a little excessive

The Sack of Nishapur, in 1221. Probably history’s largest massacre. The Persians (Khwarazmian Dynasty) killed a Mongolian ambassador. This is seriously bad manners to Genghis Khan, who held ambassadors to be sacred. The Mongols killed ~1.7 million people in a few days, and killed every living thing in the city, dogs, cats, trees, blades of grass, etc.

9. Cheeky bastard

Duke of Wellington at a soiree in 1814 France. The French King walked over to him and as the King did so, the French Generals turned their backs on the Iron Duke. The King was mortified and apologized profusely for their appalling behavior. The Duke smiled and said “Tis of little moment Your Grace. I have seen their backs before.” The Duke of Wellington is making fun of their defeat, as he quipped that he’d seen their backs because they were retreating.

10. Then why do the stay neutral in everything?

Shortly before World War I, the German Kaiser was the guest of the Swiss government to observe military maneuvers. The Kaiser asked a Swiss militiaman: “You are 500,000 and you shoot well, but if we attack with 1,000,000 men what will you do?” The soldier replied: “We will shoot twice and go home.”

11. Yeah, that’s pretty big

“No.” – Rosa Parks

12. Also, pretty huge

Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

13. Although Jay Z’s done pretty well since then (see: Beyoncé)

The song “Ether” by Nas.

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