Like the plotline of a screwball college flick about dude crew hijinks, some straight-laced admin type is trying to shut down the good vibes and party ways of fun, lovable scamps just trying to get their buzz on in Boulder, Colorado.
Boulder City Councilman Andrew Shoemaker is sick of cruising around University Hill and beholding lawn after lawn adorned with sloshed University of Colorado students and their damn beer pong tables.
SHOEMAKER: “You drive through the Hill in the spring or the fall, you see them. You see them laying out all winter. What I’m talking about is getting these things out of the yard.”
Right now, there’s no law focusing on outdoor beer pong tables, but, around town, there is a 2002 “informed couch governance,” meaning Boulder residents don’t keep upholstered furniture on your front lawn. If they do, they get knocked with a $100 first-time fine. The cases aren’t exactly rare, by the way. 65 locals were hit with that deal last year.
But the technicality is a firm, albeit strange, one. As Boulder’s code enforcement supervisor Jen Riley puts it, there’s not much that can be done about beer pong tables on front lawns, unless the students get really fancy and buckwild with its construction and style by cushioning and sewing it.
RILEY: “We do receive calls about [beer pong tables] from the public, but we tell them that just a table in and of itself is not something we can enforce under the furniture ordinance because it’s not upholstered.”
I just hope the students stage a really secretive plan that includes a montage and leads to a hilarious, heartwarming reveal that demands the respect of the councilman.