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14 of the Funniest ‘Change a Light Bulb’ Jokes

14 of the Funniest ‘Change a Light Bulb’ Jokes: Photo credit: Imgur

Photo credit: Imgur

How many Playboy writers did it take to create an article about changing light bulbs? Two. One to write it, and one to make sure he spelled everything correctly. Also, he got some help from these Redditors. Okay, that wasn’t the best, but below are a few “light bulb” jokes that are sure to brighten your day:

1. How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. They’re efficient and not very funny.
RenegadeSongbird

2. How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
The aforementioned removal transaction shall include, but not be limited to, the following steps:
1.) The party of the first part (Lawyer) shall, with or without elevation, at his option, by means of a chair, stepstool, ladder, or any other means of elevation, grasp the party of the second part (Light Bulb) and rotate the party of the second part (Light Bulb) in a counterclockwise direction, said direction being non- negotiable. Said grasping and rotation of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) shall be undertaken by the party of the first part (Lawyer) with every reasonable caution by the party of the first part (Lawyer) to maintain the structural integrity of the party of the second part (Light Bulb), notwithstanding the aforementioned failure of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) to perform the aforementioned customary and agreed-upon duties. The foregoing notwithstanding, however, both parties stipulate that structural failure of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) may be incidental to the aforementioned failure to perform, and in such case the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall be held blameless for such structural failure insofar as this agreement is concerned so long as the non-negotiable directional codicil (counterclockwise) is observed by the party of the first part (Lawyer) throughout.
2.) Upon reaching a point where the party of the second part (Light Bulb) becomes separated from the party of the third part (“Receptacle”), the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall have the option of disposing of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) in a manner consistent with all applicable state, local, and federal statutes.
3.) Once separation and disposal have been achieved, the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall have the option of beginning installation of the party of the fourth part (“New Light Bulb”). This installation shall occur in a manner consistent with the reverse of the procedures described in Step 1 of this document, being careful to note that the rotation should occur in a clockwise direction, said direction also being non-negotiable.
IranianGenius

3. How many guys in the “friend zone” does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they just stand around complimenting it then get pissed when it doesn’t screw.
lit289

4. How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. The light bulb has to want to change.
Bosmantics

5. How many Apple enthusiasts does it take to change a light bulb?
They don’t change the light bulb, they just buy a new house.
mumi1994

6. How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, but the trick is getting them in there.
flapanther33781

7. How many privates does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But we’re sending 12 and everyone better contribute.
ElGatoTriste

8. How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a light bulb?
You don’t know man, you weren’t there man!
Answerthequestionvic

9. How did the hipster burn his hand?
He changed the light bulb before it was cool.
bodhibob

10. How many Marxists does it take to screw in a proletariat light bulb?
None. The proletariat light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
CelticFiddler

11. How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to wash his machine tools in a bathtub.
KroniK907

12. How many white girls does it take to change a light bulb?
I don’t know but it’s an odd number because they just can’t, even.
lead999x

13. How many art directors does it take to change a light bulb?
Does it have to be a light bulb?
TheSciences

14. How many Amish people, oh wait.
NB420

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