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You Know, The Wachowskis’ Jupiter Ascending Might Not Suck

You Know, The Wachowskis’ Jupiter Ascending Might Not Suck: Jupiter Ascending

Jupiter Ascending

Despite having been burned by The Matrix Reloaded and The Matrix Revolutions — and let down by Cloud Atlas (we will never speak ill of Speed Racer) — nerds around the world were intrigued and excited at the prospect of a big, shiny sci-fi action movie from the Wachowskis. And when Jupiter Ascending was slotted into a July 2014 release date, we were giddy. (Yes, I can speak for all of geekdom, as we are legion and speak with one voice, like the Borg but with looser clothes.)

And then Warner Bros. pulled the film off the 2014 calendar and dropped it into February. That is never a good sign. Traditionally, no one makes a $175 million blockbuster — with a legit movie star like Channing Tatum — and dumps it in February. The reasoning given, that they needed the extra time to complete the 43 million* special effects shots and build an adequate marketing campaign, always sound like bullshit. So we feared the worst. We figured it was just…bad.

At least, until this new trailer dropped.

The story seems clear. The characters make sense. The effects look fucking great. Not in love with Channing Tatum’s X-Treem Sk8r Light Booties, but okay. And it’s abundantly clear that Sean Bean will die, as is contractually mandated.

But it doesn’t look like a disaster. It actually looks…good.

Huh.

*Not the actual number


Marc Bernardin is the Deputy Editor of Playboy.com. He really likes Bound for the obvious reasons. Because it’s an excellent neo-noir film with a smart reversal of gender roles in crime fiction, of course.

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