Did you know Charlotte McKinney is in the latest issue of British GQ? BECAUSE MAYBE YOU SHOULD PUT DOWN YOUR LIFE AND PAY ATTENTION.
Look, Charlotte McKinney’s perfect. That’s all there is to it. She’s like a modern-day Lisa from Weird Science and I, for one, am not emotionally prepared for her existence.
The lies I would drop to impress that woman are beyond unreasonable. If she commented how nice the night sky looked, I’d tell her I was the first person to walk on the moon. If she said she enjoys peaches, I’d claim to have invented them. If she said candy corn was delicious, I would even go far enough to politely nod in agreement.
Okay, now let’s remember what she looks like in full color, because doing so is better than anything you had in your day-planner for today (unless you were scheduled to do it later).
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