Both my parents being educators, I know for a fact that when teachers get together it is mostly complaining about each other, and talking about students-sometimes good and sometimes bad. In that way, the teacher’s lounge can be as petty and gossipy as the student cafeteria, only with coffee. Reddit users asked teachers to share the wildest thing they have ever seen happen in the lounge and we’ve compiled the best answers below!
1. THERE’S MUCH WEIRDER THINGS ON THE INTERNET IN JAPAN
I was an elementary school teacher in Japan for several years. A coworker once asked me what “twerking” was. The school’s internet blocks YouTube and most video sites so I was forced to explain via demonstration. I described it in broken Japanese as a “jiggly butt dance” and then proceeded to give my best approximation of what it might look like. One of my coworkers tried it out. One of the other teachers was like “it’s more in the hips, right?” and actually did a decent job. Then a third teacher was like, “What are you guys doing?” And we then proceeded to re-explain what twerking was and a couple minutes later, me and 4 other teachers in suits were twerking in the teachers’ room with varying degrees of success.
2. DID THEY NOT PRESENT A CLEAR AND DEFENDABLE ARGUMENT?
There is this nice quiet little old lady teacher marking papers while I make some coffee. Then all of a sudden she SLAMS her pen on the table and yells, “YOU CALL THAT A F*CKING THESIS STATEMENT?!?”
3. EVERY SCHOOLBOY’S FANTASY
We had a teacher fired for having sex with another teacher. And she was the hot blonde teacher that you always hoped was doing stuff like that. I think it was leaving used condoms in the lounge that was the last straw.
4. IT’S NOT JUST THE KIDS WHO ARE EMOTIONALLY DISTURBED
I used to work at a special ed. public school where most of the kids were extremely emotionally disturbed. One day, one of the kids threw a textbook out the window of his third floor classroom and it landed on a teacher’s BMW that was parallel parked in front of the school, denting the hood. The teacher went ape-shit, locked himself in the teacher’s lounge and proceeded to throw/break every piece of furniture in the room. When he finally came out, the chairs were in pieces, the tabletop was laying on the floor, and both the microwave and the refrigerator’s doors were ripped off. Some of us helped to clean up, and sure enough, he had thrown the table legs and the door to the microwave out the window, damaging another teacher’s car.
5. WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF “BETH” DECIDED TO TAKE ONE?
A few years ago I stayed late to finish high school report cards in the staff room. I was bored and needed something to do. A few other teachers came in with some of those pink “missed phone call” message pads And an idea formed. A mildly gullible friend of mine - we’ll call her Rochelle - at the high school was working with troubled girls who needed credits. The girls were in co-op courses throughout the city (nursing homes, retirement residences, kitchens, etc.) and Rochelle was frequently complaining how difficult it was to keep the girls from being fired from the co-op placements. So, instead of working on my report card comments that night, I looked up the number for an escort service called “Beth’s.” I wrote a note for Rochelle to “Please call Beth about potential co-op placements” on one of the missed call slips. I then forgot all about it and finished those report cards. Two days later, I heard from a friend that apparently, Rochelle had called Beth asking about co-op placements for the girls. A deep male voice had answered the phone saying, “This is Beth.” According to the friend who relayed the story friend, Rochelle argued with Beth that no, she needed to speak to the real Beth about co-op placements. Rochelle also shared that she was calling from a high school and that it was important for the girls to have co-op experience and to get credits. I guess it was finally poor Beth who put two and two together and told Rochelle that this was a prank and she was calling an escort service. Seven years later, I have still never owned up to Rochelle that I did that.
6. THEY ONLY DID IT BECAUSE ALL THE COOL TEACHERS WERE DOING IT
I taught in a school very near the Colorado border for a few years. After they legalized weed, one of my co-workers (a lady around the age of 60) said she was going to Pueblo to visit her son. The next thing I knew, there were about five middle school teachers throwing wads of cash at this woman and asking her to bring them back the goods. She delivered. I had been to Colorado the week before, so I was all set; I was just relishing the newfound information that a significant portion of my co-workers liked to get high.
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