A wise man once said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” That man was NHL great Wayne Gretzky, but could have just as easily been my uncle, Ron, who is a raging alcoholic. Reddit has shown that, just by altering the orator, we can drastically change the meaning of many of our most famous quotes. Here are a few of our favorites from the Reddit community:

1. Upon them, within them, same thing

“Be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.”
– Monica Lewinsky

2. Can I still say, “Who?”

“Say ‘what’ again. Say 'what’ again, I dare you, I double dare you motherfucker, say what one more Goddamn time!”
– Alex Trebek

3. As long as they’re smaller and weaker than you

“To be the best you have to beat the best.”
– Chris Brown

4. He’s asking for a lot here

“If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best.”
– Dr. Jekyll

5. Theorizing Dirty

“They see me rollin’, they hatin.”
– Stephen Hawking

6. I am the Half-Blood who knocks

“Say my name.”
– Voldemort

8. Best Cosmos Episode Ever

“And if you don’t know, now you know, n^&#$.”
– Neil DeGrasse Tyson

9. This is just plain dirty

“If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.”
– Ron Jeremy

10. This would be a great taunt to the 99%

“Never has so much been owed by so many, to so few.”
– CEO, JP Morgan Chase

11. Gandalf didn’t succeed the first time either

“You shall not pass!”
– My freshman writing teacher

12. Oh, they minded

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”
– Jerry Sandusky

13. Two faces, one testicle

“You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.”
– Lance Armstrong

14. Suck it, Brute

“True friends stab you in the front.”
– Julius Caesar

15. Well, she couldn’t really say this though

“Oh, you think the darkness is your ally, but you merely adopted the dark. I was born in it, molded by it.”
– Helen Keller

16. Hasta la vista, Messiah

“I’ll be back.”
– Jesus