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‘Friends’ With Benefits: Which Friend Had the Most Sex?

‘Friends’ With Benefits: Which Friend Had the Most Sex?: NBC

NBC

As you may or may not know (but damn well should), the beloved ‘90s sitcom Friends pivot-ed its way onto Netflix on New Years Day. To celebrate this joyously floopy occasion, we decided to combine two of our most favorite things: Friends and sexual intercourse, and find out who had the most sexual partners during those 10 fateful years.

So without further ado, I give you the definitive ranking of our six favorite Friends, from who scored the least to who scored the most.

(Note: This ranking only includes sexual escapades that happened over the course of the show, not previous partners that are referenced in passing. Sorry, Girl Who Dumped Ross During Sex.)

6. Monica Geller

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I know what you’re thinking: how the hell did Monica come in last place on this thing? Well, the short answer is: because I said so. The long answer, however, is that Monica was probably the most successful when it came to long-term relationships, which is why she had the fewest number of partners during the show’s run. For most of the first three seasons, Monica was either with Richard (the best guy ever) or Pete (the richest guy ever). Then in season 4, she got together with Chandler and they lived happily ever after. And that’s how you pull a Monica.

Season 1: Paul The Wine Guy (does he sell it, drink it, or he just complains a lot?), Alan, Fun Bobby (or Alcoholic Bobby), and Ethan.
Season 2: Richard (arguably everyone’s favorite ex).
Season 3: Julio (the crappy poet) and Pete (who later went on to direct Iron Man).
Season 4: Chandler.

TOTAL: 8 SEXUAL PARTNERS


5. Rachel Green

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Rachel and Monica are technically tied for the last place slot, but I decided to give Rachel the edge because, well, it’s Rachel. She’s singlehandedly responsible for the most popular haircut of the ‘90s and is easily the most successful breakout star from the show. Plus, she showed the most nipple.

It’s worth noting, however, that Rachel’s past sexcapades are referenced often (high school, college, etc.) and not included in the final number. Plus, she and Ross alone had sex exactly 300 times over the course of the show (according to Ross’s count anyway).

Season 1: Barry (a.k.a. Mr. Potato Head) and Paolo (booo!).
Season 2: Ross (hooray!).
Season 3: Tommy (played by the masterful Ben Stiller in one of my personal favorite episodes).
Season 4: Joshua (booooring).
Season 5: Chip Matthews (via flashback).
Season 6: Paul (a.k.a. Bruce Willis, a.k.a. Elizabeth’s dad, which gives her and Ross a very creepy connection to one another).
Season 7: Tag.

TOTAL: 8 SEXUAL PARTNERS


4. Chandler Bing

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Trust me, I’m just as surprised as you are that Chandler wasn’t dead last, and I say that as the biggest Chandler fan in the world. I think we were all expecting the Chan Chan Man to awkwardly jig into the number 6 slot in this particular contest, but nope! He’s a strong #4, which is even more impressive considering Chandler exclusively dates women who are way out of his league (hmm, I wonder why I relate to him so much…) and all of his partners are found within the first four seasons. In the end though, he gets Monica, so I’d say things turn out just fine for him.

Season 1: Janice (OH. MY. GOD.), Aurora, and Nina Bookbinder.
Season 2: Jade and Susie Moss (a.k.a. Susie Underpants).
Season 3: Mary-Angela Tribbiani and Joanna (R.I.P.).
Season 4: Kathy (who’s responsible for making Eskimo Brothers out of Joey and Chandler), Marjorie, and Monica. And then no one else ever again. Because love, that’s why.

TOTAL: 10 SEXUAL PARTNERS


3. Ross Geller

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Coming in surprisingly highly, ranked at #3 is Ross, or as I’m sure he’d like to be known, Dr. Ross Eustace Geller, Ph.D. While he’s clearly a hit with the ladies (3 marriages and counting!), Ross can be a bit of a downer, which probably accounts for at least a few of his break-ups. Well, that and lesbianism. Ross is a smart guy though, and he’s a genius when it comes to physical comedy (see: all of season one and the season 10 classic, The One Where Ross Is Fine). FUN FACT: While by no means having the most numbers-wise, Ross actually has the most racially diverse collection of sexual partners. Bravo, Dr. Geller.

Season 1: Carol (Wife #1).
Season 2: Julie and Rachel (Wife #3, but not until later).
Season 3: Chloe (THEY WERE ON A BREAK!) and Bonnie.
Season 4: Emily (Wife #2).
Season 5: Janice (yes, that Janice).
Season 6: Elizabeth (very scandalous, Professor Geller).
Season 7: Whitney and The Library Girl.
Season 8: Mona (who was too good for Ross anyway).
Season 9: Charlie (who was also too good Ross anyway).

TOTAL: 12 SEXUAL PARTNERS


2. Phoebe Buffay

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Pheebs. Pee-Hee. Regina Phalange. Phoebe is everyone’s favorite weirdo, and her delightfully odd demeanor was clearly a hit with the fellas, as she lands herself at a solid #2 (or as Joey might say, “hehe, #2”). In terms of relationships, Phoebe defined herself by having no type whatsoever, dating a wide variety of men with a wide variety of professions (occasionally at the same time!). Along with coming in second place in this ranking, Phoebe also wins the distinction of being the only one of the six Friends to never date another one of the six Friends. She’s also the only one to give birth to triplets, but if I just start listing weird things that Phoebe’s done, we’d be here all night.

Season 1: David (the scientist) and Roger (the psychiatrist).
Season 2: Scott (who Joey refers to as “his God”) and Ryan (the Navy man played by Charlie Sheen).
Season 3: The Loud Upstairs Neighbor and Vince (the firefighter).
Season 4: None due to pregnancy.
Season 5: Larry and Gary (Michael Rapaport!).
Season 6: Kenny the Copy Boy (definitely NOT Ralph Lauren).
Season 7: Kyle (Mr. Hums-While-He-Pees), The Guy From Three Days Ago, and Jake.
Season 8: Tim (a.k.a. Monica’s sous-chef), Don, and Parker.
Season 9: Mike. And then that’s it. Because Mike’s her lobster.

TOTAL: 16 SEXUAL PARTNERS


1. Joey Tribbiani

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Was there ever any doubt? Even if you’ve only seen one episode of Friends, you had to know that Joey would be crowned #1 on any sex-related list in existence. Throughout the entire show, Joey was the epitome of a ladies man. An obvious precursor to Barney Stinson, Joey was involved in far fewer serious relationships that any of his friends, instead content to casually date a different woman nearly every episode and put true love on the backburner.

Whether you like him or not, there’s one thing we can all agree on: “How you doin’?” is the worst pick-up line in history, but Joey sure knew how to make it work.

Season 1: Andrea (the screamer), Angela (the one who knows how to “accentuate her boobs”), Sandy, Lorraine, and Melanie.
Season 2: Lori, Erika (Joey’s crazy stalker), and Shannon.
Season 3: Ginger (the prosthetic leg girl), Lauren (the understudy), and Kate (the actress).
Season 4: Kathy (who he loses to Chandler), Casey, The Stripper From Ross’ Bachelor Party, and Felicity.
Season 5: Katie (the puncher), The Girl Who’s Good In Bed, and The Girl Who’s Good In Bed’s Roommate.
Season 6: Janine (Joey’s dancer roommate).
Season 7: Unnamed Girl (with whom Joey had “some… not a lot” of sex with that day), Erin, and Cecilia (Susan Sarandon!).
Season 8: Shelly (the Soap Opera Digest interviewer).
Season 9: Hayley, Hayley’s Roommate, Days Of Our Lives Extra #1, Days Of Our Lives Extra #2, Days Of Our Lives Extra #3, The Girl Joey Doesn’t Want To Wake Up, and Charlie (who he ends up losing to Ross).
Season 10: Laura (the social worker).

TOTAL: 31 SEXUAL PARTNERS


Jamie is a writer based in Los Angeles where he also co-hosts the Best of Friends podcast. Follow him on Twitter @jwoodham.

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