In the last two years, Nintendo has dominated the holiday shopping season with the wildly successful releases of both the Nintendo Classic Mini and its little brother, the Super NES Mini. The pitch was foolproof: “Hey, let’s put out some of our most popular consoles from the ‘80s and ‘90s again, because people love the ‘80s and ‘90s, only let’s make them tiny this time, and let’s also make sure that nobody can actually buy them.”
Predictably, people have gone nuts for both limited releases, to the point where tech sites have tag pages filled with news articles covering where and when you can actually find the treasured devices in the wild. (Spoiler: Nowhere!) The Super NES Mini, which officially hit stores September 29, also unofficially left stores September 29. These things sell like hotcakes.
So it isn’t surprising that Nintendo wants to keep hitting the nostalgia well, and its next rumored mini release makes perfect sense: It’s (probably) the Game Boy, the iconic handheld console that first set up shop in our hearts in ‘89 and stayed there all the way until the early aughts, when it ceded space to the Game Boy Advance, eventually the DS and most recently, the Switch.
According to a Japanese Twitter bot that tracks trademark information, Nintendo recently filed a trademark listing with an image of the Game Boy, which suggests it’s due for the classic treatment soon.
Nintendo hasn’t confirmed or denied anything, but this one seems pretty obvious.
So now that we have ample time to prep for the console and the subsequent disappointment that comes along with not procuring one, it’s time to speculate which classic games could be included with the update. Here are the top five Game Boy titles of all time, which are correct:
DuckTales (1989) - Scrooge McDuck was Donald Trump before Donald Trump.
Kirby’s Dream Land (1992) - It’s very easy, and since I was very bad at playing video games, I loved it.
Kirby’s Dream Land 2 (1995 ) - Ditto.
Dr. Mario (1990) - There is no reason Mario, a plumber, should’ve been a doctor.
Pokemon Red & Blue (1998) - Everyone knows you start out with Bulbasaur.