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‘Why Don’t The Astronauts Just Drill?’ The Honest Trailer for Armageddon Pulls No Punches

‘Why Don’t The Astronauts Just Drill?’ The Honest Trailer for Armageddon Pulls No Punches:

Ah, 1998… It was a simpler time. We weren’t at war, no one had an Apple Watch, Clinton was still in the White House, and we got two asteroid-hitting-the-earth movies in one glorious summer. The biggest of the two was Armageddon, and though you probably haven’t thought about that movie in at least a decade (I think about it every day, because I still have the poster I won at a McDonald’s), the fine folks at Screen Junkies are here to remind of you its awesomeness with an “Honest Trailer.”

Yes, there was a time when Michael Bay was not a joke among movie lovers. Back then, his movies were still absolutely bonkers monstrosities that made no sense, but damn it, they were fun absolutely bonkers monstrosities that made no sense, and we loved them. Armageddon is arguably the last of these, and this trailer makes use of almost all of its best moments, from that weird sexual stuff with the animal crackers to the twisted logic behind teaching oil drillers to fly spaceships instead of teaching astronauts to drill. I won’t spoil all of the jokes for you, but I almost fell out of my chair when the narrator called Billy Bob Thornton “Brad Pitt’s Eskimo Bro.”

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