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How To Christmas Shop at a Convenience Store

How To Christmas Shop at a Convenience Store: The Simpsons

The Simpsons

We get it. You’re a busy guy. Sure, everyone else managed to finish their Christmas shopping before Christmas Eve, but there’s no way they had to deal with even half the crap you had to put up with. Time flies, end-of-year TPS reports, all that. Still, you can’t show up empty handed on December 25 if you want your friends and/or family to talk to you ever again.

But what do you do when all the “regular” stores are closed? Head to the one place that never closes, your local convenience store/bodega/deli/7-11. Your options may be limited, but with this helpful guide and a little creativity, you should be able find all the gifts that you need.

Here is a list of 10 last-minute holiday gifts you can buy at the convenience store.


Beer
Most convenience stores sell beer. Most of the people in your life like beer. Need we say more?


Scratch-off lottery tickets
Odds are there is someone on your list who wouldn’t mind free money.


Duct tape
You can fix anything with duct tape, even a relationship that is teetering on the brink of oblivion.


Batteries
That TV remote is going to need new double A’s during that Christmas day marathon of A Christmas Story.


Condoms
Here’s to getting lucky (safely) this holiday season.


Cell phone charger
Anyone whose phone has died in the middle of a text to someone with whom you’d hoped to use the above-mentioned condoms knows how clutch a spare phone charger can be.


Blunts/rolling papers
Don’t think of it as enabling your stony friend/relative. Think of it as providing professional development training. Rapper Wacka Flocka Flame recently offered $50,000 for a personal blunt roller.


Cologne
If you position brands like Aqua Velva and English Leather as retro and classic instead of old and crusty it completely changes the perception.


A sandwich
You can take it out of the wrapping and pass it off as homemade, artisanal even.


More beer
Seriously, the gift of a six-pack has never not cheered someone up.


Justin Tejada is a writer and editor based in New York City. Follow him on Twitter at @just_tejada.

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