Elections seem to always get people on Facebook worked up, but with so many hot button topics all over the news right now Facebook debates are at an all time high it seems. But what is the proper way to argue politics on Facebook? We’ve all certainly seen the wrong ways, but, believe it or not, there’s a foolproof way you can pull it off without offending any of your friends and family as well as not getting yourself worked up and angry. Just make sure you follow each step precisely or it might not work.
1. Open your Facebook page, but don’t scroll down any. There are almost certainly some argument landmines waiting for you. Ignore your initial instincts here.
2. You’re also going to want to post a hot take political opinion of your own. Just hold your horses there, pal. You’re getting ahead of yourself.
3. Place your hand on top of your laptop just above its built-in camera.
4. Gently press down until the screen is resting against the keyboard. Great job!
5. If you’re charging a phone or any other USB device, be sure to unplug the cord from your laptop. Just a gentle tug should eject it easily.
6. Next you’ll want to make sure your power cord is detached. If your battery isn’t fully charged that’s ok.
7. Great! Your laptop is now completely cord free!
8. Now take the same hand you closed your laptop with and pick it up. If it’s a little heavy for you, feel free to use both hands, or if you’d like to switch hands that will also be acceptable.
9. You’re gonna want to locate the highest accessible point in your house or office. A good stairwell will do the job, but for me personally I’m using this second story ledge.
10. Now let go and watch that thing tumble down like Hans Gruber at the end of Die Hard.
11. Walk down to where your laptop landed and, with either foot you prefer, stomp it as hard as you possibly can. You can wear shoes if you want. I didn’t and it still worked just fine.
12. Next you’ll want to pick it up and walk to the nearest fence you can find. For me, it was this wall separating two parking lots. Feel free to be creative here and find a fence that works for you.
13. Now toss that bad boy as hard as you can. I mean really put your arm into it like you’re a young Nolan Ryan.
14. And there you have it! That’s the best possible way to argue politics with your Facebook friends! Enjoy!