After hyping this moment for a week now, “Bachelor” finalist Jade told Chris about her Playboy photos and video. Chris promptly showed her to the door. (Literally, he was like, “There’s the door, I’ll walk you to it, and we can cry, and then I can get back to making out with these other chicks.”)
Chris says he didn’t boot Jade because of her Playboy modeling, but there’s no way to know if he’s telling the truth. Maybe he didn’t really know her well enough. Maybe he liked the other girls better. Or maybe he didn’t want to take Jade back to Iowa, where everyone would definitely know (and definitely Google) her past.
Here’s why I think the Playboy shoot was a factor: they were doing great before the revelation. I only watched a few episodes this year, so I'l leave it to Bustle to describe the Jade/Chris dynamic heading into Monday night.
“Everything we’ve seen of Jade and Chris together so far shows that they make a really good match, most importantly that Chris’ sisters liked her enough to give her the Cinderella date. She’s a sweet, awesome girl who even told Chris that she can see herself living in his tiny little hometown with him. If he stops giving her a fair chance because of a few nude photos, he’ll be making a huge mistake.”
If Jade was eliminated because of her Playboy shoot, that hardly seems fair. Yes, she appeared naked in Playboy pics and videos (not in the magazine.) Some massively uncool guys might have a problem with that. Fine. But hold up. Let’s talk about “The Bachelor” for a second. Let’s step back and reexamine the tableau in which this all took place.
This is a network TV program in which a single man makes out with (and some might say manipulates the hearts of) women (some widowed, some mothers) who are all living in the same house together, telling each of them that they are special, when his own promiscuity is proof that they’re not.
The women who survive this televised gauntlet of intrigue, backstabbing and ugly crying are rewarded with time in the “fantasy suite,” which is a room where the bachelor can and sometimes does have intimate relations with the remaining contestants.
So if Chris has hangups about Jade working for Playboy, let’s not all lose sight that he appears on a TV show with a Fuck Room. Into this Fuck Room women are rotated, and the one who who pleases the bachelor most both inside and outside the Fuck Room is taken as his bride.
To Chris’s credit, he was broken up about sending Jade home and said he might be making the biggest mistake of his life. He seemed genuine in his grief. Jade was broken up, too. It was a sad and emotional ending. Perhaps because it was so unnecessary.
What’s more immoral? What should any of us have a problem with? Being photographed naked? Or grinding a group of women through televised hell only to reward them with nonexclusive, well-publicized sex, the culmination of a seemingly demeaning process by which all but one woman is left a loser?
Die in a dumpster fire, “The Bachelor.”
I’ll see you next week.
Joe Donatelli is Senior Editor of Playboy.com. Twitter: @joedonatelli. Email: email@example.com.