After Taylor Swift turned her glamorous 1989 tour into the concert equivalent of sweeps week, with guest stars ranging from Selena Gomez and Justin Timberlake to Julia Roberts and Kobe Bryant, Madonna apparently wanted in on the game. So at her recent Rebel Heart tour performance in Brooklyn, Madonna brought out Anderson Cooper, but…didn’t exactly treat him the same way Swift did her guests.
Once Cooper makes it onto the runway stage during “Unapologetic Bitch,” Madonna bends him over, spanks him, and humps him from behind before strutting back to the main stage to award him the “very special prize,” which is…a banana. From there, it’s sort of an awkward on-stage conversation, with Madonna making a number of innuendo jokes, including “I’m sure you’ll figure out what to do with it.”
If you didn’t know Cooper was a famed journalist, you could easily mistake him for a dad that reluctantly got pulled on stage and is trying not to be rude. He throws down some earnest dance moves and then backs slowly off stage toward the end. In truth, Cooper was a huge fan of the evening, as the photo above is one of several on his Instagram.
But now that we know special guests are the name of the game, maybe here’s what to expect from Madonna’s Rebel Heart tour:
Madonna and Gwyneth Paltrow outdoing each other with fake British accents
Madonna and Rosie O'Donnell outdoing each other with Donald Trump impressions
Madonna and Brad Pitt speaking about an important political issue, though she kisses a little too intensely upon his exit
Madonna waving a giant “God Save The Queen” flag while Beyoncé descends from what appears to be a helicopter’s rope ladder
Madonna asking Fergie if she always thought the Queen of Pop was better than Cher and Tina Turner put together and then feeding her a Werther’s Original as a reward