People always ask me if I have plans for summer like it’s sixth grade and I’m going to finally touch a full pair of boobs. Naturally, as an adult, I answer respectably, explaining that my summer go-to will be day-drinking indefinitely somewhere aglow with sunshine and surviving a nervous breakdown when I again realize my own mortality following a bad sunburn that I pick up after inevitably blacking out beneath the same unforgiving sun I thought was on my side. Then, I don’t know, maybe some volleyball that’s somehow more uncomfortable than the scene from Top Gun.
But not this year! Hell no, I’m going to watch this video of Melanie Iglesias slowly, sensually, and seductively licking an ice cream cone beneath hot lights in a bikini while it melts all over her for the rest of my summer/life. Shot by photographer Nick Saglimbeni of SlickforceTV, this visual masterpiece strikes up so much weird insanity in me that I’m pretty sure, while watching this for the dozenth time, I breathily whispered aloud, “That’s not how you eat ice cream…”
Even with that, my total unhinging from reality and lost ability of coolly watching babe videos like a gentleman (or even a normal person of minimal integrity and sanity), Melanie Iglesias just gave me months’ worth of plans at least. Plus, damn, maybe toss in a full pair of boobs and this is going to my summer!
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