Funerals are supposed to be a time to grieve, but also a time to celebrate the life of the deceased. The only problem is that words like “grieve” and “celebrate” are open to many different interpretations. Also, accidents don’t take funerals off. Below, Reddit users sound off on the most f@#ked up stuff they’ve seen go down at a funeral.
1. And they thought it was proof of resurrection
My grandfather was an identical twin. When gramps and our family walked into his brother’s funeral, it became very clear, very quickly, that not all of the friends of the deceased knew this.
2. Better late than never, I suppose
The joke my uncle made at my Dad’s funeral. He walks in to make a speech and the first thing that he said was “Well, I’ve waited 52 years to say this, but I am now the number one son!”
3. Not the best timing
My grandpa’s funeral happened to take place on my birthday. I wasn’t bitter about the date arrangement…That is until my aunt announced in the middle of the funeral that we should all sing happy birthday to me.
4. See: definition of irony
My aunt had a stillborn baby, so we attended the funeral. They planned to release a bunch of butterflies from a box as a spiritual symbol of sorts, but forgot to poke holes in the box prior. There was absolute shocked silence as the parents dumped a box of dead butterflies on the floor.
5. Seems more like a celebration
When my alcoholic, druggy grandmother passed the funeral was uncomfortable at best. Notable occurrences included my grandfather telling the priest that they were still married (spoiler, they hadn’t been together since the 60s) and my uncle singing, “Ding dong the witch is dead,” over and over. When the priest asked us to say nice things about my grandmother, my 11-year-old raises her hand and says “Grandma was naughty, she used to shoot cats in the backyard.”
6. Certainly could’ve been worse
My childhood best friend died earlier this year. We lost touch in our teens. He got into a lot of drugs and eventually wound up choking to death on his own vomit as his druggie friends watched. The funeral home did a slideshow of photos of him. Every single photo showed him getting high, being stoned, drunk, or wearing juggalo makeup. When his mom gave his eulogy, she proclaimed herself a juggalo in his honor.
7. This is more than a little creepy
My significant other’s stepbrother had an infant that died and at the funeral they passed the baby around like it was still alive. Most people held it. I personally think that’s pretty weird.
8. He deserved it
My friend hung himself, and there is no way that orthodox priest would hold requiem for person who killed himself, because it’s against church beliefs. We are at the funeral, and the priest says, "There will be no requiem for suicide deaths, but if you can pay up, maybe we can work something out.” "Sure priest, come right behind this small chapel to give it to you.” His two brothers beat the shit out of the priest.
9. How did it get in the hole in the first place?
Showed up at the cemetery and there was a cow standing in the grave. Had to wait for them to get a winch and take the cow out before my great uncle could go in.
10. Talk about taking advantage of an opening
The widow being comforted by her cousin in an “odd” fashion. They moved in together 6 months later, married not long after that.
11. This will become a completely normal thing
I learned that apparently taking selfies with the corpse is a thing.