What a time to be alive! Following an armed rancher militia, led by Ammon Bundy, taking over a wildlife refuge in Oregon, ultimately hoping to inspire “a movement,” Twitter practically laughed the men off the world stage. First it was Twitter calling them “Ya’ll Qaeda” waging “Yeehawd,” and then, thanks to Oregon-based Decemberists frontman Colin Meloy, it was the hashtag #BundyEroticFanFic, which is exactly what you think it is. And it is glorious.
“They huddled together for warmth. The cold of Ammon’s Ruger 22 against Brian’s naked thigh sent a thrill up his spine.” #bundyeroticfanfic— colin meloy (@colinmeloy) January 6, 2016
“Jason pressed Jed against a rack of "Birds of Oregon” books; his breath was sweet with jerky. Somewhere, an egret cried" #bundyeroticfanfic— colin meloy (@colinmeloy) January 6, 2016
“‘It ain’t snacks I’m hungry for, Trevor.’ Ryan’s heart was beating wildly beneath the quilted flannel of his shirt.” #bundyeroticfanfic— colin meloy (@colinmeloy) January 6, 2016
And then the hashtag trended on Twitter and everyone got inspired.
As Cletus gazed longingly at Ammon’s naked body, he finally understood the real fight for grazing rights. #BundyEroticFanFic— Catherine (@deja1422) January 7, 2016
“Did you bring condoms?” Jed whispered. “Not to worry, we’re protected by the 1st and 2nd Amendment” Ammon replied. #bundyeroticfanfic— J Julian Christopher (@JulianChristo) January 7, 2016
Ammon exercised his right to Jed’s bare arms, stroking his fingers lightly down until he reached Jed’s loaded weapon. #bundyeroticfanfic— Laura Packard (@lpackard) January 7, 2016
“Remember, the safe word is 'Western Meadowlark’.” #bundyeroticfanfic— Paul Tena (@paultena) January 7, 2016
“I want you to take me like Obama takes our freedoms,” Jed whispered. The sound of a Carhartt zipper was his only reply. #bundyeroticfanfic— Liandre (@canunderum) January 7, 2016