Playboy Advisor: Is There a Blow-job Conspiracy Afoot?

By Playboy Advisor

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My wife has never been good at giving head. Now, all of a sudden, she has tremendous technique. I have to wonder if she had this skill all along and was withholding from me. What gives?—A.J., Cleveland, Ohio

You suspect a blow-job conspiracy? So do we. It’s more likely your wife has been reading, listening, watching or wandering. Given the number of books with oral-sex tips (Lip Service, Tickle His Pickle, The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio, etc.), the preponderance of chatty girlfriends and the ease with which one can study professional cocksuckers online, we wouldn’t jump to any conclusions. You could tell her how much you enjoy her newfound enthusiasm, but it’s probably apparent. Does she have any complaints about your technique?

My wife is amazing in bed, but she doesn’t like the lights on during sex. Our bedroom gets pitch-black, and I have a hard time staying aroused. Is this normal? What can I do?—B.F., Springfield, Missouri

Men spend their days imagining what women look like naked; to turn off the lights when we finally have a nude woman within reach is a crime against our nature. Continue to reassure her that you find her ravishing, but also suggest a practical compromise. Place a book light on a nightstand, a low-watt colored bulb in a bedroom lamp or a dimmable bulb in an overhead light, ideally with a remote she can control (but, by mutual agreement, not turn off). You may never enjoy sex at high noon, but after your wife sees your reaction to seeing her, she may have a moment of enlightenment. If she still insists on complete darkness, provide it. Dim the lights, blindfold her and keep her guessing what comes next.


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