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Advisor: How Do I ask Her to Try Bondage?

Advisor: How Do I ask Her to Try Bondage?: JLT

JLT

How do I ask a woman to try bondage? I don’t want to come across as a potential rapist or pervert. I usually use police handcuffs.–M.H., Grand Rapids, Michigan

Tying someone up, or being tied up, requires a great deal of trust, and it may take a while for a relationship to get there. Unless you met at a bondage convention, don’t pull out any implements until you discuss outside the bedroom your kinky desires, and hers. If she’s agreeable, offer your own wrists first, though don’t use keyed cuffs. Instead, start with quick-release cuffs (i.e., ones that unlock with a latch), preferably lined in fur. They’re easy to find online. Agree on a safe word to end the game should there be any discomfort, physical or otherwise. If she’s reluctant, play without cuffs: Have her hold part of the bed or the back of a chair while you play her body like a fiddle. Sex-trick mistress Laura Corn suggests having the woman place her palms on a dresser and then positioning a nickel on the back of each hand. Tell her if one falls while you have your way, she will be “punished.”


This question is from the NOV 2013 issue of Playboy. To read more from the Advisor column, click here.

For answers to reasonable questions relating to food and drink, fashion and taste, and sex and dating, write the Playboy Advisor, 9346 Civic Center Drive, Beverly Hills, California 90210, or email advisor@playboy.com. The most interesting and pertinent questions will be presented in these pages each month.


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