People say this is the golden age of television. But they must be talking about Netflix, because it feels like networks have just been remaking the same five shows over and over. If this trend continues, here’s what local TV listings will probably look like by the year 2020.


Time Show
8:00pm Big Bang Theory (CBS)
Something With “Marvel” In The Title We Know You’ll Watch (ABC)
Master Chef: Cook This Dead Possum We Found (Fox)
Dateline: Everyone’s Probably A Criminal (NBC)
9:00pm More Big Bang Theory (CBS)
Dancing With D-list Celebrities (ABC)
Master Chef: Cook Whatever Is In Your Pockets (Fox)
Heroes Reborn… Again (NBC)
10:00pm Big Bang Theory Will Still Be On After You’re Dead (CBS)
How To Get Away With Murdering The Cast Of The View (ABC)
Newer Girl (Fox)
Blindspot, We Don’t Know How This Show Stayed On Either (NBC)


Time Show
8:00pm NCIS (CBS)
Some Other Shit With “Marvel” In The Title (ABC)
Are You Smarter Than This Bag Of Laundry (Fox)
The Kick (NBC)
9:00pm NCIS: Los Angeles (CBS)
A Hospital Where All The Doctors And Nurses Are Attractive (ABC)
Sing A Song While People Hurl Insults At You (Fox)
Celebrities Play Boardgames (NBC)
10:00pm NCIS: Boise (CBS)
Desperate Housecats (ABC)
Newest Girl (Fox)
America’s Got Tarantulas!


Time Show
8:00pm CSI (CBS)
We Continue To Suckle At Marvel’s Teat (ABC)
Derivative Animated Show (Fox)
Law & Order: Robot Crimes Division (NBC)
9:00pm CSI: Cyber (CBS)
The Bachelor (ABC)
Derivative Animated Show 2 (Fox)
Fat People Try Not To Be Fat Anymore (NBC)
10:00pm CSI: We’ll Figure It Out Later, Just Watch It (CBS)
Whoever Is Voted Off The Bachelor Is Dropped Into An Actual Shark Tank (ABC)
The Simpsons (Fox)
Sing While A Pack Of Dogs Attacks You (NBC)


Time Show
8:00pm 2 Homeless Girls (CBS)
Marvel’s Paint Drying (ABC)
So You Think You Can Perform Surgery (Fox)
Chicago Fire (NBC)
9:00pm 2½+∛∑4.3=? Men (CBS)
White Family Sitcom (ABC)
Videos Of People Falling Down (Fox)
Chicago P.D. (NBC)
10:00pm We Put Cameras In A Family’s House Without Telling Them (CBS)
Non-White Family Sitcom (ABC)
Gotham Prequel: Infant Batman (Fox)
Something Else About Chicago’s Civil Servants (NBC)


Time Show
8:00pm Survivor: Syria (CBS)
TGIF: Marvel’s Your Grandparents Having Sex (ABC)
Rainn Wilson Is Funny When He’s Not Dwight Schrute, We Swear (Fox)
Donald Trump Screams At Strangers (NBC)
9:00pm What’s Tom Selleck Up To? (CBS)
Something Your Wife Will Probably Make You Watch With Her (ABC)
The Mindy Project/Bones Crossover (Fox)
How About A Show Where Fat People Sing? (NBC)
10:00pm Big Bang Theory (CBS)
20/20 = 1 (ABC)
Why Did We Cancel Firefly? (Fox)
Do Something Entertaining Or We’ll Drop Your Parents In Acid (NBC)


Time Show
8:00pm Criminal Minds (CBS)
Eat This For Money! (ABC)
Gordon Ramsey Screams At The Elderly (Fox)
We’ll Keep Giving Matthew Perry Chances (NBC)
9:00pm Criminal Thoughts (CBS)
Ellen Pompeo Needs Our Money (ABC)
John Stamos Is A Sexy Old Person! (Fox)
Unwatchable (NBC)
10:00pm Criminals = Bad (CBS)
Cougar Town With Actual Cougars (ABC)
Another Attempt To Recreate Seinfeld (Fox)
Something To Kill Time Until SNL Starts (NBC)


Time Show
8:00pm Fat Guy, Hot Wife (CBS)
Tim Allen Doing Man Stuff (ABC)
Simon Cowell Is So Snarky Isn’t He? (Fox)
A Single Guy Raises A Baby That He Found (NBC)
9:00pm Fatter Guy, Hotter Wife (CBS)
Girl Cop! She’s A Girl And An Authority Figure! (ABC)
Doctor Who Everyone Thinks Is Crazy, But Knows What He’s Doing (Fox)
Lawyer Team (NBC)
10:00pm Undercover Boss: North Korea (CBS)
Don’t Trust The Live Bear In Apartment 23 (ABC)
Something With A Handsome Black Guy (Fox)
Ugh! Our Children Are Teenagers! (NBC)