Sex goes with music the way dark chocolate goes with red wine: perfectly. But there are so many options for booty music! What’s a smart, generous, handsome gentleman like yourself to do? Why, consult the gentleman’s handbook, of course (that would be Playboy.com; just FYI). This list of 15 sexy songs is by no means comprehensive, but it is a diverse selection of timeless tunes to serenade you and your lover(s) during special private adult alone time. Read on, and try to contain yourself until the exact appropriate moment to deploy these sex bombs.
“NICE AND SLOW,” MAX FROST
The title says it all. Listen while having sex in the bathroom of some kind of chic underground club where you have to give a secret password at the door — or, you know, do it in your bedroom.
“I WANT A LITTLE SUGAR IN MY BOWL,” NINA SIMONE
If you’re fond of thinly veiled culinary metaphors, you’ll greatly enjoy having sexual relations to this fine tune from Simone’s 1967 album Nina Sings the Blues.
“ANYTIME, ANYPLACE,” JANET JACKSON
It doesn’t get better than this one as far as slow, sweet sexytime music goes.
“CAN’T GET ENOUGH OF YOUR LOVE BABY,” BARRY WHITE
It’s here because it would be criminal to not include it here. Barry White was the expert on getting down to it, and any sexy songs list would be in flagrant violation of correct etiquette if it did not pay homage to the master.
“THE BEAUTIFUL ONES,” PRINCE
There are so many Prince songs from which to choose that it’s really daunting to pick just one. However, in this case, let’s go with something from Purple Rain. You can also play the entire Purple Rain album. Be advised that this song contains the lyric “If we got married would that be cool?” Proceed with caution. (Because Prince is an internet tyrant, the song isn’t available to stream. So take this Beyonce cover instead.)
“CRY TO ME,” SOLOMON BURKE
Most of Solomon Burke’s music is baby-makin’ music, or do-the-thing-that-leads-to-baby-makin’-but-wrap-it-up-so-there-ain’t-no-baby music. This song is no different. It’ll make you understand why the man himself ended up with at least 14 kids by quite a few different ladies.
“NO DIGGITY,” CHET FAKER
The original song by Blackstreet features Dr. Dre and Queen Pen, and it’s a classic song to get down to. But listen to Chet Faker’s version and just try and tell me it doesn’t…do something to you in the bathing suit area.
Why is Portishead so sexy? Their music sounds like something that people did interpretive dance to in the ‘90s, because their music is something that people did interpretive dance to in the ‘90s. Yet at the same time, it’s sexy as hell. “Roads” is a prime example of Portishead’s bedroom appeal.
“THESE ARMS OF MINE,” OTIS REDDING
If you haven’t had sex to this song yet, what have you been doing your whole sex life? It’s time to rectify the situation and get ‘er done. Otis will never do you wrong.
“KIND OF BLUE,” MILES DAVIS
Granted, we’re talking about an entire album here, not a single song. Doesn’t matter. Put it on when it’s raining outside and have sex all Sunday long.
“MY DOORBELL,” THE WHITE STRIPES
Is this song about sex? Who knows? It should be about sex, because it makes people think about sex, and thinking about sex can lead to having sex. You should probably have sex to this song immediately.
“I WISH I WAS THE MOON,” NEKO CASE
Sleepy sex at 2 a.m. while the moon shines brightly through the open window? Just saying, this would be the perfect soundtrack.
“UNTITLED (HOW DOES IT FEEL),” D’ANGELO
Reportedly written as an homage to Prince’s early music, this slow jam delivers on all levels. All sexy levels, that is.
“BY YOUR SIDE,” SADE
This is hot relationship sex music, like you just got engaged or it’s your first night in the house you bought together or you’re just both really good-looking so your sex life always resembles some sort of unrealistic rom com. It’s also good make-up sex music.
“LAY ME DOWN,” SAM SMITH
Perfection. That is all.
Sara Benincasa is a comedian and the author of Great and Agorafabulous!: Dispatches From My Bedroom. She tweets @sarajbenincasa and is currently on tour: dates are at SaraBenincasa.com/shows.