These days, couples place way too much emphasis on what other people are doing. The problem with that is, people lie—a lot. So next time you hear a couple (or some troll in the comments section) bloviate about how often they have sex, there’s a pretty good chance they’re full of it. At least that’s what a new report from YouGov is suggesting. According to its data, only four percent of Americans have sex daily.

Why is this number so small? Probably because finding the time and energy to have sex between work, children, tweeting, rewatching Game of Thrones hosting game nights, hosting out-of-towners, sitting in traffic, getting into Twitter wars, manscaping and frequent bouts of unsexy indigestion (just me?) tends to get in the way.

According to the data, 14 percent of the public has sex once a week and the same amount do the deed a few times per month. When pressed about their “ideal” number, one in four Americans think a few times a week is just fine. As is true of the stereotype, the data revealed twice as many men want to have sex every day compared to women, though other research has attempted to debunk that myth, citing 60 percent of women want to have more sex than men. (Yes, our heads spin sometimes reporting on all these conflicting studies.)

Americans can’t seem to shake the proverbial grass-is-greener attitude, either. Forty percent of married Americans think that singles have more sex whereas 36 percent of single Americans think the opposite. Ultimately, the singles are correct. YouGov’s data shows almost three-quarters of married people have sex at least once a month, where only a third of singles had during the same time period. It definitely makes sense. Singles don’t necessarily have a designated lay unless they’re in some ill-advised friends with benefits scenario. To find a willing sexual partner without having to pay for her would require some serious skill.

But there is one thing couples and singles have in common: We both adhere to lazy choreography between the linens. Almost 30 percent of Americans shared that they will only engage in two positions during sex; a little less than 20 percent will switch things up “at least” three times. Here’s the kicker: Americans with children are likelier to explore more positions than singles. Less surprising, Americans in the earlier stages of their relationship will pursue more positions. Of course, this once unyielding vigor greatly lessens as relationships age.

Is sex important to a relationship? Of course it is. But over time, more important priorities eclipse a roll in the hay. Data shows more than half of Americans–65 percent–believe it’s important to prioritize sex even though they understand it can be inconvenient, and this belief was even more prevalent among couples who’ve been together longer than a decade. However, one in five of Americans in relationships for more than twenty years believe a good sex life is not important to a healthy relationship.

So sure, sex matters. But daily sex does not. The frequency in which a couple has sex has become this fabled measurement of a relationship’s success when it’s not necessarily the case. No relationship is “better” than the next. Just because somebody has sex with their partner more often does not mean they love their partner more. It just might mean they have more flexible jobs or perhaps share higher than average sex drives.

Most important, as we’ve similarly reported, it’s never a good idea to compare yourself or your relationship to others. What works best with your partner in your relationship is the truest measurement of success there can possibly be.