Sophie Tweed-Simmons is the best thing about Kiss by far. In fact, she might actually be the only person on this planet that could even get me into her father’s band—or worse, like maybe talk me into joining a cult or getting a millennial back tattoo in Olde English, reading something like, “Only God can subtweet me.” Honestly, I’d probably support a Kickstarter for her world domination if that was ever on the table.

Ugh, see, this is a problem. Tweed-Simmons is obviously too powerful of a babe. She’s got the influence of Kilgrave and the looks of Jessica Jones. It’s good I only have her Instagram to follow, because if I met her in person, I’d follow her to the ends of the earth. If she winked at me, I’d probably just explode.