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‘Tea Party Simulator’ Makes Fantasies/Nightmares Come True

Who has time to stage real tea parties anymore? What with the crushing responsibilities of daily adult life, gathering up the stuffed animals and carefully arranging all of the place settings like we used to seems like a daunting task.

Thankfully there’s Tea Party Simulator 2015, standing at the ready to give you your tea party fix without any of the hassle.

Like Goat Simulator, Surgeon Simulator, and other half-serious simulators, Tea Party Simulator trades in wackiness and the insanity derived from awkward, tough-to-use controls. Your goal is to have one freakin’ awesome tea party, but making your hands do things like carefully set down a plate or rotate at the wrist to pour tea isn’t as easy as it sounds (there is, however, a “pinky out” button, so that’s covered). Luckily, you do have full “fuck this shit” flip-the-table capabilities, it seems.

Screw up too badly and the bear insults you. Not sure if that’s incentive to do well or do poorly. Seems awesome either way.

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