We’ve all been a victim of feeling like we are the only ones in the world with our specific issues. Turns out it’s not so true. Reddit asked their Psychiatrist users to give us examples of thoughts that are not exactly unique and these are our favorites. More helpful mental tips found here.
”INAPPRPOPRIATE” SEXUAL DESIRES
I have been working for years with couples and single people that express a, let’s say, social perspective of what sex should be, and although we have come a long way and things are getting slightly better—in the sense that homophobia is still a thing, but at least society is starting to understand and deal with it—, there’s still this emotional tagging related to what you should feel and experience when it comes to arousal and physical intimacy.
People try to self label themselves as heterosexual, homosexual or something else to create an identity for everything they are as a person, when in fact, this is a very simple definition that affects very little of you apart from your sexuality.
Unfortunately, the problem here is the same: misinformation. There is very little understanding and honest conversation about sexuality, which is as important for us as humans as food and shelter are. They are part of our biological disposition, and if led by unhealthy complexes and ideologies, might be enjoyed in a very poorly, unhealthy manner, which may cause much more harm than any other psychological discrepancy.
FEELING CRAY CRAY
Feeling “crazy”. I would say the majority of my clients at some point ask if they are crazy. It’s sad that mental illness is seen as black and white, sane or crazy, and not a continuum that can ebb and flow over time.
SIT WITH YOUR NEGATIVE FEELINGS
I think the most common thing I find in my practice is that people assume they need to “get rid of” their negative feelings. Anxiety, anger, sadness, guilt…these are normal feelings everyone experiences and it’s ok to feel these things and acknowledge them. Learning how to “sit” with negative feelings is something I think I’ve tried hard to normalize with my clients.
NOT SCHIZOPHRENIC HALLUCINATIONS
Seeing shadows, figures, or other things or hearing murmurs, voices, or similar, during the half-asleep-half-awake state are not schizophrenic hallucinations. It’s an in-between dream state and does not mean you have schizophrenia. It’s normal.
Also: sudden, unwelcome, sometimes even violent, thoughts that pop into your head are also normal and not indicative of psychopathology or sexual perversion. They’re intrusive thoughts and as long as you don’t think you’re going to act on them, there’s no reason to worry about them.
So many patients eventually share that they are holding onto some memory, thought, or experience that they typically avoid thinking about and definitely avoid talking about at all costs. They fear that doing so will expose their most reprehensible flaws to the world and everybody will see the monster inside them.
However, the awful shameful secrets are always way bigger in their heads than they are in reality. Whatever your shame is, hundreds of other “normal” people have it too. There is probably a chatroom or website dedicated to it. Let it go. You’re just a weird naked ape like the rest of us.
Teenagers who think they are “special” and “mature for their age”. It’s almost all of them. It’s kinda funny, actually.
IT IS OKAY TO NOT LOVE EVERYONE
Two things I’ve come across a lot:
1. Not caring deeply for family members. Especially for their children. They expect this instinct to kick in at some point where they’ll feel fiercely protective, but it never happens.
2. Feeling “imposter syndrome,” which is basically a feeling that you don’t belong somewhere (work or school), that you’re not capable, and soon everyone will figure out that you got there on a fluke and kick you out.