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This Week In Sex: Emily Rinaudo, Threesomes and the Quest for the Perfect Vagina

MORNING SEXY

Layin’ here all up in this bed
With these thoughts all up in my head
About yo hands all on my waist
And the way you make me say yo name
Said you got a thang for me, then show me
And if I like it
Baby watch the things that I could show you
Early in the mornin’
I’mma have you moanin’

“Early In The Morning” – Ashanti ft. French Montana

💭

A photo posted by ArsenicMagazine (@emilyrinaudo) on

Do you think of mornings as a time to get sexy? Maybe not. You’ve got dragon breath, your face is scratchy like flesh sandpaper, you might wake with drool decorating the side of your mouth, or sleep in the corner of your eyes, none of which paints a very sexy picture. And yet…

A product of to much 🍕🍝🍩 #arsenic @arsenicmagazine

A photo posted by ArsenicMagazine (@emilyrinaudo) on

That’s Emily Rinaudo. She’s a perfect reminder of just how sexy a bed can be early in the morning.

I’ll be your morning cup of ☕️ #arsenic @arsenicmagazine @jsmithrevealed

A photo posted by ArsenicMagazine (@emilyrinaudo) on

Hitting the snooze button ☕️💤

A photo posted by ArsenicMagazine (@emilyrinaudo) on

Italian American 🍝🍷 #arsenic @arsenicmagazine

A photo posted by ArsenicMagazine (@emilyrinaudo) on

A photo posted by ArsenicMagazine (@emilyrinaudo) on


THANK YOU, SCIENCE

Speaking of which: Morning sex has been found to be good for you. An hour of sex is roughly equivalent to a half-hour of jogging. You have choices to make this weekend. Make those choices wisely.


JUST ANOTHER DAY AT THE OFFICE

Playboy offices are kind of a magical place. This week, Playmate Ana Cheri stopped by the office and stole a hat. Nah, just kidding. The real story is that she tried on a custom-made bunny suit, and well, you just need to see for yourself how well it fits her.


THAT’S A SUPER SIZE

Singer and unofficial ambassador of sexiness Niykee Heaton is currently traveling the world on tour, which means she spends most of her nights in hotel rooms with her manager. Niykee’s known for giving her fans a candid view of her life, both backstage as well as other places…

This week Niykee shared a shot of her eating a burger and fries in her hotel room, naked.

For anyone who wants to run their mouth or comment on her Instagram about her being naked with a burger…Niykee offers this rebuttal.

A photo posted by Niykee Heaton (@niykeeheaton) on

Oh, by the way, when we say she spends her nights in a hotel room with her manager, this is Niykee’s manager, Lauren Pisciotta. Not a bad partner to spend your hours chomping on burgers and fries.


RIP ‘DAMN, DANIEL’

This week, the Damn, Daniel meme died. (No, seriously, it’s dead, tell your Facebook friends.) To mark its premature passing, we found the last good meme to be milked from the surprise shoe sensation. It’s Damn, Daniel… but for booty…


INSTA-CRUSH

Also, this week, we introduced you to our new Insta-crush Tanya Mityushina. You see why we’ve been crushing so hard. Damn, Tanya.

Insta-crush Tanya


ELECTORAL POLLS

The 2016 campaign shifted gears after Super Tuesday reshaped the race. Frontrunners Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump solidified their positions. Which raised a lot of questions. Like, is this what happens when a nation doesn’t invest in public schools? Of course, there are other questions to ask, like: Which candidate gets the PornHub vote?


PORN IS GOOD

We tend to give adult films a hard time (sorry, the pun was right there). But as new research shows there are lots of unexpected positive benefits found from watching adult films. For instance, regular adult film viewers are more likely to treat women as equals.

Most people would never guess that. They often still look down on adult films. Which is why people get mad when two college girls film a lesbian sex scene in their university library. Well, okay, maybe that’s a bad example. But if you want to know more about that film, here you go…


GEO-GRAPHIC PREFERENCES

If you had to guess: What would you say is the most popular adult film genre in America? Bet it will surprise you. Nah, just kidding, it totally won’t surprise you. It’s lesbians. But if you go state-by-state, there are quite a few surprises. Like, what’s up with Nebraska? Why is “cartoon” the most popular search term out on the prairie?


CHANGE CAREERS NOW

What jobs are the sexiest? Flight attendant, right? Well… To help answer that question, this vid breaks down which jobs will get women and men swiping right the most often on Tinder.


OBLIGATORY LINDSEY PELAS PICS

Whoa! Hold up! It’s been a long winter for many of you. We’ve got your back. This moment of sexiness was brought to you by Lindsey Pelas…

Just being super casual on the beach 🌊🙀😂

A photo posted by lindsey (@lindseypelas) on

Lindsey on the beach… that’s what California dreams are made of. And, in case you need some help to lift you out of the wintertime blues, here’s Lindsey with her dog, Tosh. A double hit of cute and sexy to warm your heart and get your blood pumping.

Not much I love more than my little Tosh 🐶💓

A photo posted by lindsey (@lindseypelas) on


THIS IS MY BOYFRIEND … AND THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND

To provide us a fuller picture of what it’s like to be polyamorous, this week Bridget Phetasy took a deep dive into her six weeks spent with a married couple as the second woman.

After three weeks of flirting and weird hint-dropping, one night I was down on their couch watching movies, and they both went to bed. Right before Jill went into their room, she said, “Ya know you can sleep in our bed with us if you want.”

I must have sat on that couch for an hour contemplating my options. It’s weird being sober at moments like these. Most threesomes happen with a lot of booze and few inhibitions; going into the situation consciously and clear-headed felt like a blessing and curse. I knew nothing would be the same once I opened that door. It was like taking the red pill; there was no going back.


MORE GOOD SCIENCE-ING

Bridget chose to taste the forbidden fruit of pleasures deemed taboo. But, really, who determines what’s taboo? What if they’re wrong? What if polyamory is the healthier relationship model for humanity? Like, let’s be real, sometimes monogamy feels like it was invented by people who weren’t big fans of sex or love.

David Barash examines polygamy from an evolutionary standpoint in his book “Out of Eden: The Surprising Consequences of Polygamy.” This week, Noah Berlatsky sat down for a chat with Barash about poly-arrangements like harems and committed threesomes.

You say that humans are polygamous but not promiscuous.

Well, if you’re polygamous it means you form mating systems in which you mate with more than one member of the other sex. But “promiscuous” implies a lack of concern about who you’re mating with. Whereas if you’re a harem member as a woman, it’s expected that you’ll mate with just the one guy. And if you’re a harem-keeper you’re expected to mate with your wives.


BI THE WAY…

Now let’s examine love, sex and relationships from another angle. Let’s get cubist on sex. Here are bisexual women talking about the difference between having sex with men and with women.


MIND THE GAP, GUYS

Female sexuality has recently become a topic of interest for mainstream attention. That’s new in Western culture. Our history of ignoring the fullness of female sexuality has left us with an orgasm gap. What’s an orgasm gap? It’s like the pay gap, but in the bedroom. Basically, women get less than men.

From a 2010 study, straight men reported having an orgasm 85 percent of the time they had sex while straight women experienced the joy of an orgasm only 64 percent of the time. This week Justin Lehmiller offered a few ideas for how we can keep filling the gap with more orgasms.

Here’s some good news: there are endless ways for women to reach orgasm.

And here’s the bad news: there are endless ways for women to reach orgasm.

To help you deal with this sexual paradox, Esquire offers you a few new positions to tongue-please her for some overwhelming oral satisfaction.


WHEN CONSENT GOES BOING

Another aspect of sexuality we’ve only begun to discuss openly and honestly is how to seek consent. It can be confusing for some folks. They might need a little extra help from, say, a cartoon penis and butt-vagina creature that will give them pointers on how to seek consent for sexual activity. Hey, whatever works.


BLING YOUR THING

This week our very own Yoonj Kim got her vagina vajazzled. She had her kitten prettied up with some labial jewelry. But that’s not all. She also spoke with a doctor about the labiaplasty trend, and Kim bravely took a vagina collagen treatment for the team. “It feels like I got a nice little massage on my vagina,” is how she put it. Check her quest for the perfect vagina…


PROBABLY NOT BEN CARSON’S FRUIT SALAD

Vaginas are wonderful things. Some guys love vaginas so much they never miss a chance to nibble on their girl’s peach. And then, there’s this dude…

He loves “vagina fruit.” Wanna guess what that is? We’ll wait.

Okay, you ready? The dude inserts fresh fruit into his wife’s vagina. She walks around with it inside of her all day. After it’s marinated in her juices, at the end of the day he withdraws his fruit deposit, eats it and savors the flavor of his wife on his fruit. You can’t make this up… read on.


TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF-IE

Well, it’s that time of the week. It’s time to get your mind right for what surprises the weekend holds. Here’s a perfect way to pre-game for Tinder-swiping your way to a sexier Saturday night: it’s a gallery of 30 women, all of whom have perfected their selfie game. Enjoy!

Until next time…keep it sexy!


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