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This Week In Sex This Week In Sex

This Week In Sex: Jordan Carver, Naked Miley and Sex in Space

This Week In Sex: Jordan Carver, Naked Miley and Sex in Space:

And a poet said, “Speak to us of Beauty.”
Where shall you seek beauty, and how shall you find her, unless she herself be your way and your guide?

Khalil Gibran, Beauty XXV

Yep! That sums up perfectly how we feel about German model Jordan Carver. If you don’t know her Instagram account, trust us when we say her feed boasts so many unforgettably sexy images like these, you should let her curvy beauty be your guide.

jordan carver 2

Or, as our man Khalil Gibran would put it:

And beauty is not a need, but an ecstasy.
It is not a mouth thirsting, nor an empty hand stretched forth,
But rather a heart enflamed and a soul enchanted.

This German model has got us feeling both enflamed and enchanted.

Jordan carver 4

This week, we told you about the Insta-crush we’ve got going with Daphne Joy. Go ahead and check this gallery. We bet you start crushing just as hard as we are. If you can believe it… she’s 50 Cent’s ex-girlfriend. Say what?! Yes! Remember how, in his song, Many Men, 50 told the world that since he survived those nine slugs it’s proof he must be here for a real reason? We think Daphne might’ve been it. (Just kidding, 50.)

Our man, Gibran, has some poetry ready for her, too:

Beauty is eternity gazing at itself in a mirror.
But you are eternity, and you are the mirror.

Daphne Joy

One of our favorite blondes, Kate Upton just celebrated her 23rd birthday. We curated 23 images and gifs to mark her special day. Happy Birthday, Kate!

Is anyone willing to help Lindsey Pelas? Do we have any volunteers? The blonde bombshell has been having persistent difficulty keeping her breasts in a bikini. You see, she’s got a pair of really super American boobs, the kind of curves that just want to be free.

Lindsey Pelas

Now, we do have one idea to suggest to her: the hand bra. It sure seems to work for these girls.

03 hand-bras

Speaking of using your hand for a bra, did you hear what Miley Cyrus did this week? She got naked with a pig. Yep! She was naked and painted in Day-Glo colors, so you may need to judge the sexy for yourself. It was part of an interview Miley gave to Paper magazine, in which she was equally brave and candid about her sexuality:

“I am literally open to every single thing that is consenting and doesn’t involve an animal and everyone is of age. Everything that’s legal, I’m down with. Yo, I’m down with any adult – anyone over the age of 18 who is down to love me. I don’t relate to being boy or girl, and I don’t have to have my partner relate to boy or girl.”

There’s no doubt you have to be defiantly brave to sell sexiness in this culture. You’re literally stripped free of everything but your body and your attitude. Ask a cam girl and she’ll tell you all about it. But hey, you don’t have to ask–there’s this awesome new documentary called Cam Girlz. In the film, women explain why they perform sexually for the Internet.

We’re big believers that sexiness makes the world better. And correctly applied, sexiness can help fix the world.

Like, this video. It sure seems like the perfect solution to every problem we can think of… at the moment. It’s just curvy women jumping in slo-mo on a trampoline. Like, who can think about war at a time like this?

Sex therapist Ian Kerner wrote a book called She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide To Pleasuring A Woman. This week, in an interview with LifeHacker, he shared some of his easy-to-remember tips for tongue-pleasing a woman. These are approaches, ways of thinking about cunnilingus:

Going down on her turns you on; you enjoy it as much as she does.

There’s no rush; she has all the time in the world. You want to savor every moment.

Her scent is provocative, her taste powerful. It all emanates from the same, beautiful essence.

Together, the words “savor” and “beautiful essence” remind us of something–oh, that’s right! Did you check out Thong Thursday this week? It’s the day we like to feature the sort of derrieres that feel like answers to your prayers. You know, girls with bubbles like hers:

13 courtneytailor

It used to be that joining the Mile High Club was about as sexy as you could get without technically being “on the planet.” Speaking of which, if you want to know how to have sex on a plane, just watch this–it’s sheer genius:

Good stuff, right? But, nowadays, making love above the clouds is no longer the highest you can go with your orgasms. Things are about to change. PornHub plans to send adult film stars into the cosmos and film them as they have sex in space. Like most folks, we saw Gravity. And so, we have one question for PornHub: won’t sex push the their bodies apart? And couldn’t just one squirt of lube spin them around in the opposite… okay, we have lots of questions.

While we’re talking about the future, we assume you’ve heard about sexbots. The latest polls show that 1 in 5 guys would bang a robot. What about you? Would you let a robot pleasure and polish your love pickle? What if she could talk to you? That’s the next innovation to come in robotics (pardon the pun).

Speaking of emissions, the condom manufacturer Durex commissioned a study to find out which countries are the most sexually-active. The answer was Greece. Some 87 percent of Greeks said they have sex on a weekly basis. Would you believe that Russia was second with 80 percent of respondents saying they had sex in the last week? Guess where America scored…

Yeah, 53 percent of Americans said they had sex in the last seven days. Eeesh… That’s nothing to brag about, especially when compared to Italy’s 76 percent, or Germany’s 68 percent. We’re just ahead of Japan, who came in at 34 percent-and you’ve probably heard about their sexual troubles. Get to bed, America!

There were a slew of weird, wild sex stories from around the world this week.

A British girl and her friends got naked on a holy mountain in Malaysia. A few hours later there was a devastating earthquake. Now, she and her friends are in court. They could be thrown in a Malaysian prison for setting off the earthquake. This is really happening… in 2015. A killer earthquake is being legally blamed on the sexiness of a naked British woman.

Then there’s this guy… he asks his friends to pour fire ants onto his pubes and… you know, see what happens. We bet you can guess what happens next. But, we should warn you… the dude’s a screamer!

For the guys who still debate whether or not to use emojis. This settles it. A recent survey by Match.com found that single people who used emojis were way more likely to have sex. The numbers don’t lie. Emojis are a new language. Use it.

Here’s one last bit of sexiness to send you into your weekend, gifs of UFC ring girls being as sexy as they want to be.

Until next time… keep it sexy.



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