In the mood for some laughs? Well we’ve got you covered. Below you’ll find the funniest most amazing most fabulous tweets from this past week. Don’t doubt us, it’s true. If you like these tweets, make sure and follow the characters who wrote them so then you’ll be sure to find something to laugh at each every day.
Wanna feel old? Only 6 people are now Kung-Fu Fighting.— Michael, still here (@Home_Halfway) November 15, 2016
Squire: We’re under attack, your majesty— Sean Leahy (@thepunningman) November 16, 2016
King: Where are all my men?
Queen: You sent them to put a fucking egg back together
songs should have sequels too. i wanna hear journey come back with “eventually i did stop believing a little bit”— miel (@miel) November 16, 2016
ladies and gentlemen this is your captain speaking, i just had the craziest dream— Cat Damon (@CornOnTheGoblin) November 15, 2016
If you see a swastika, turn it into a Windows ‘95 logo. pic.twitter.com/FmDpJtWfQ7— Nasty Erin (@gibblertron) November 12, 2016
Just settled a divorce over Parrot custody/visitation. Neither may teach it negative phrases abt the other.— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) September 15, 2016
I went to law school for this.
i tried to grab a fly in front of my laptop and a coworker looked at me weird and asked why i was grabbing at the wikipedia page for hot dog— leon 🐣 (@leyawn) November 15, 2016
you’re thinking of growing your hair out? that’s cool, my hair grows by itself, no thinking required on my part— wolf pupy (@wolfpupy) November 16, 2016
[arriving to thanksgiving in a whipped cream bikini]— dan chamberlain (@amfmpm) November 15, 2016
anybody order a cutie-pie
HOLY SHIT THERES A TRUMP PROTEST ON CLUB PENGUIN RIGHT NOW pic.twitter.com/tY33Hq2mvi— lourdes (@gossipgriII) November 13, 2016
free sample person: hi would you like one?— Sen. Crap Assington (@KarateHorse) <a href=“https://twitter.com/KarateHorse/status/798555668185747456”>November 15, 2016
me: [desperately wanting one] no thank you. You know what I guess I’ll try one
wakes up and looks at phone— Miss O'Kistic (@missokistic) November 11, 2016
ah let’s see what fresh horrors await me on the fresh horrors device
[stuart little stops next to me at the light in his fuckin sweet ass little red car]— goth turtle (@dubstep4dads) November 11, 2016
my gf, immediately: i think we should see other people
MAGICIAN: and for my trick i will disappear— Bob Vulfov (@bobvulfov) November 16, 2016
SON IN AUDIENCE (tear in his eye): please papa not again