Vodka is a blast. But like every millennial, I’ve spent half my adult life swearing it off. I often forget vodka wasn’t brewed up by some ancient witch or some futuristic villain, who then sent it here to our time in order to ruin all of our lives. I mean, after you spend a night doing shot after shot, having the best time ever with what essentially becomes “drunken water,” you wake up with your brain all smashed in and you’re left with way too much of a liquid you don’t ever want in your body again.
As it turns out, that totally works, since vodka makes one hell of an…anything. It can apparently do everything from clean your feet and make your hair shinier to revitalize your jewelry and save your flowers. Perhaps most importantly though, you can spray vodka on your dirty clothes and—boom—stank be gone.
Don’t wear those clothes while they’re wet though, because you’ll smell like a horrifying drunk. Just wait it out, as vodka dries odorless.
Now look at at that, vodka somehow improving your quality of life!