It didn’t take long before news of this study circulated around our offices that Playboy’s editors concluded that a list of 237 reasons seemed frighteningly short. Here are 50 more:
1. Because if I don't, the terrorists win.
2. Preparation for a future movie role.
3. It’s part of my work with the Make-A-Wish Foundation.
4. To get rid of the gross of condoms I purchased on eBay.
5. So she would do my laundry.
6. The cab driver said he didn’t mind.
7. Although he was rather homely, he was wearing expensive Italian clothing.
8. I didn't want to pay the speeding ticket.
9. Her hindparts were red and engorged, indicating she was in heat.
10. It was on my checklist of things to do before I die
11. It was something to do in that half hour between South Park and Daily Show.
12. Master insists or else I get no dinner.
13. Wii tennis elbow prevented me from getting the job done myself
14. I read something in the Playboy Advisor and wanted to see if it was true.
15. The elders forbid it, and I'm so sick of being pushed around by them.
17. The sign outside said "Have sex—get cookie."
18. I was trying to determine the person's gender.
19. There's not much else to do up here in space.
20. I thought the person was someone else.
21. I was told it is the customary greeting in this country.
22. I didn't know it was sex when I had it. Sorry.
23. I was in the shower and I slipped. Honest, that's how it happened.
24. To become his bitch, so that he would protect me from the other inmates.
25. I was trying to kill my husband, a rich old oil tycoon with a bad ticker.
26. I thought it would be the best way to relieve my case of priapism, an erection lasting more than four hours. No such luck, though.
27. It's the latest dance craze: "The sex."
28. The high priestess said it would ensure a bountiful harvest.
29. I am part of a secret government program seeking to breed a race of super-soldiers.
30. It was the old lady or Lenny Briscoe, and the old lady won.
31. There was a misprint in the assembly instructions of a bookshelf I bought at Ikea.
32. It's good to drain the pipes before cold weather sets in.
33. I wanted to give the surge a chance to succeed.
34. I don't see my cousins that often.
35. No more Harry Potter books to read.
36. I was testing for steroids.
37. I was trying to remove that new-car smell.
38. Wait, I did what with who?
39. When Bob said ``Look, nobody can do it standing up in a hammock. . . ‘’
40. The boss ordered us to go to the mattresses, and one thing led to another.
41. I didn’t spend all that time inflating her for nothing...
42. Because I saw a boobie.
43. It's better than not having sex.
44. I wanted Paula to say nice things about my performance on American Idol.
45. Erroneous belief that the world was about to end.
46. Dogfighting not doing it for me anymore.
47. If you’re making a homemade sex tape, it’s kind of the sine qua non.
48. I thought it offered me the best chance to succeed Rosie on `The View.'
49. Lack of imagination.
50. To stop the ticking... The ticking of my hideous biological clock!
RSS 2.0
http://www.playboy.com/mt-tb.cgi/4201