Q 6

PLAYBOY: : Did you have any second thoughts about doing Tom Snyder after Dan Aykroyd had made that impression famous on the original Saturday Night?

Joe Piscopo: I cannot tell you how tough it was just replacing the first cast. I'd walk down the street and someone would say, "Hey, Saturday Night, right?" I'd say, "Yeah." He's say, "You suck!" When I was asked to do Snyder, I thought they were crazy. But I was told not to worry. So the first time, I put a little twist on it and did a Spanish Tom Snyder. They gave me a thin mustache. On the newscast, we said, "Tom is trying to boost his ratings by hitting the Hispanic audience." [Breaks into rapid-fire Spanish and ends with Snyder laugh] It worked really well. Then, Eddie wanted to do Gumby and needed a setup. Snyder was almost off the air at that point, and someone suggested I do The Uncle Tom Show. I had a big bow tie, still had the cigarette and had Gumby as the guest. "Good morning, boys and girls. How the hell are you? Ha, ha, ha. Shel's over there, and he was drinking all night, ha, ha, so if the camera wiggles, don't worry about it, OK? Ha, ha." When Snyder was finally off the air, we did him straight-out in his hotel room, holding a Teddy bear. It was a well-written sketch and it showed, sensitively, the way NBC had just said, "Well, Tom, thanks but no thanks." It took my doing all three before I finally stopped feeling self-conscious about following Aykroyd.

Q 7

PLAYBOY: Why does America have a sneaking suspicion that David Letterman is neither as hip nor as happy as he would like us to believe?

Joe Piscopo: It's exactly that quality in Letterman that appeals to me most. I can't stand people who walk around saying, "Life is great. How wonderful. Let's get laid." People who are too up and positive make me nervous. But I love Letterman. He's not overly enthusiastic. He takes risks, though sometimes they don't work. I don't even see, as some critics have suggested, where he's acid-tongued or an inept interviewer. The first time I did my Letterman character was on Letterman's show. He was really gracious. He asked if I was thinking of doing anyone new, and I said, "Yeah. You." Then I put the little spacer in my teeth and said [breaks into Letterman], "Oh, my, oh, my. We're having more fun than human beings should be allowed, ladies and gentleman." I looked into his eyes, and it was wonderful. He seemed to get a real kick out of it.

Q 8

PLAYBOY: Where do you draw the humor line?

Joe Piscopo: At vicious attacks on living people. On the other hand, I could easily have done humor about Princess Grace shortly after her death, because for some reason, people were making too much of her being this angel. So dead people are OK. Elvis is fine. I wanted to do Karen Carpenter for Death-TV. I hope that when I die, people make fun of me, as when Howard Hesseman hosted the show and did Belushi jokes in his monologue. It was wonderful. Belushi would have appreciated it. There's something really silly about mourning the dead. I remember a sketch we did called "Rock-'n'-Roll Heaven." We marketed Jimi Hendrix syringe darts; a Jim Croce plane that crashed by itself; Mama Cass lunch boxes. That's hysterical to me, damn it; but to attack living people is uncalled for. But, hey, talk to me when I'm gone. I'll be in my grave and people will be doing Piscopo jokes.

Q 9

PLAYBOY: Do you have any joke items, such as whoopee cushions or clown paintings, in your house?

Joe Piscopo: My God, no. If you've got clown paintings, you've got serious problems. I don't understand clowns, anyway. People make clowns out like they're brilliant. But, hey, they paint their face, walk out and fall on their ass. Brilliant. They go out and get into a barrel. Rough work. I never even laughed at clowns as a kid. Clowns are like mimes. I don't understand mimes, either. In fact, I can speak on behalf of the entire cast: We're not mime fans, to put it mildly. Once, a guy in full mime regalia--white face, big shoes, gloves--auditioned for one of the films we were doing. He kept at it so much that it was pathetic. You know, get the fuck out of here. I've never seen mime as an art form. I don't mean to be nasty, because I'm sure mimes and clowns are very nice people.

Q 10

PLAYBOY: What's wrong with most comedy albums?

Joe Piscopo: Comics are funny visually, so when they record an album of stand-up material, it's usually not as good as seeing them onstage. Also there's a real void of albums in the Lampoon vein. Or stuff like when Albert Brooks said, "You be the comedian," and left little gaps on the record for the listener. Both were brilliant. I want to do comedy sketches on my next album. One idea is using Allen Funt and making Candid Camera a thread. It would be as though you were switching a TV dial. You'd hear, "And now, here's Mr. Candid Camera himself, Mr. Allen Funt!" Then: "We took some Tylenol capsules, opened them up and...." Click. Later, "We went to Washington, D.C., and raised the 14th street bridge about eight feet and...." Click. "We went to the Bellevue Stratford Hotel in Philadelphia dressed as air-conditioning repairmen...." Click. Again, dead humor is great.

Q 11

PLAYBOY: You're playing a gangster in your first feature film, Johnny Dangerously. Many of your Saturday Night predecessors have gone on to do feature films. What has their experience taught you?

Joe Piscopo: I have to be very careful. I could do an Animal House or a Stripes tomorrow, but I shouldn't copy Belushi or Murray. So I've already turned down projects. Those guys from the old cast could more easily make mistakes with their first films because the show itself was so popular. But if 48 HRS. hadn't worked for Eddie, he'd be in a lot of trouble. So I just want to be in something that has quality to it. I want the reaction to be, "Hey, nice performance." I also love being in television, and it's where I truly want to end up. But I have to give films a shot, because its the natural transition.

Q 12

PLAYBOY: You and Murphy are friends. Where do you hang out together? What do you do?

Joe Piscopo: Eddie's one of those magic people. We laugh and do a lot of silly things. We bought matching black Jaguar XJSes--now I'll be making personal appearances in Akron, Ohio, to pay for mine. The last time I hung out with the Murph, he took me in his limo to see the new offices of Eddie Murphy Productions. It was a terrific two-story brownstone with a waterfall upstairs and Eddie's big office downstairs. We also go to night clubs. I take him to my house occasionally. My son loves Eddie. Our evenings are always pretty straight, because Eddie doesn't do drugs or smoke anything. He doesn't even drink. I usually have a beer. His favorite drink is root beer with no ice.

You know, I couldn't see myself on the show without him. We're not blood brothers or anything, but Eddie is a source of inspiration. When he comes up to my office and we're fooling around, I can write more easily. I've been having trouble writing since he's been off working on movies. I know it sounds like two old homos talking, but you know how it is when you have a friend you can goof off with.