Contributing Editor David Rensin followed Saturday Night Live's rubber-faced funnyman Joe Piscopo around 30 Rockefeller Center with one burning question. Says Rensin, "From the S.N.L. set to Joe's dressing room to wardrobe to his office, I had to know: If the name Piscopo were a verb, what would it mean? Piscopo didn't know but later revealed that his surname meant bishop in Greek. What follows, then, is also a 20 Questions with Joey Bishop."

Q 1

PLAYBOY: Describe in intimate detail the sexual habits on the new Saturday Night Live cast.

Joe Piscopo: I don't know about their outside habits, but we do have these orgies every Saturday about 11:15 P.M. to loosen up for the show. It's usually in Eddie Murphy's dressing room. It's exciting. We're all pretty wild. The lamb, however, goes a little crazy.

Q 2

PLAYBOY: What's the funniest thing that happens to you during sex?

Joe Piscopo: Oh, Jeez. I don't believe in talking about my sex life with my wife. I can't stand guys who walk around saying things like [very heavy New York-construction-worker accent], "Holy shit, I'm horny! I think I'll go fuck the shit out of my wife. You know, she was sitting on my face last night and it was fuckin' great. The phone rang, but I let it go, because it was really fuckin' great. Unbelievable. Fucked the shit out of her. Hey, when's the last time you fucked your wife up the ass?" People who say that should be shot. But you hear it all the time, right? I think too much of my wife to put those things in print.

Q 3

PLAYBOY: OK, then, when did your personal sexual routine become guilt-free?

Joe Piscopo: I've never been guilt-free about sex. I'm Catholic. You sure you don't want me to talk about my comedy routine? OK. I had a sexual routine early on, in my cocky-asshole days. We all tried to be so cool about sex. [Smooth voice] "Hey, baby, everything's fine, baby. You feel me inside you, baby." But then you get close to orgasm and--arrgghh!--you totally lose it. Happens every time. Now I even feel awkward talking about sex. I've been married for ten years. I've been perfectly straight. Plus, my in-laws will be reading this. I feel funny. Shy. Embarrassed. No one's ever asked me these questions before. Sex was never really a major reason for my existence, anyway. Once in a while, I just jumped into the sack; I've done my share of playing around. But mostly, emotional relationships turned me on. I know I'm ruining my reputation as an Italian. My relatives are all saying, "What is he over here? A faggot?" Maybe it was fear or something, but if a woman came on to me, it was a turnoff. I lost all respect. I was brought up very Italian. The woman you married and your mother had to be perfect angels. At times, I think of myself as macho. But when we talk about this, I get real shy. I think underneath it all, I'm very sensitive.

Q 4

PLAYBOY: What's the toughest thing about being a regular guy?

Joe Piscopo: It stands in the way of being funny. Keeping up the drive is tough. I don't have the rapid-fire, hard edge all the time. Eddie is the only person I know who is regular and has the quick comedy. You have to have a little anger inside to do that. I've had a wonderful life. Michael O'Donoghue once said I was the guy who would blow away the family, the nut who would hold the neighborhood hostage, because I was so regular.

Q 5

PLAYBOY: Is your wide range of impressions a skill or a sickness?

Joe Piscopo: Lots of people who do impressions are weird. I refer to what I do as "characters." I relate "impressions" to Vegas, and I'm so afraid that when Saturday Night is over, I'll see JOE PISCOPO IS ANDY ROONEY on some Vegas marquee. If I do a character well, like Letterman or Rooney or Snyder, then it's an impression. Otherwise, Sinatra, Koppel, Rather, McMahon, Hartman--they're just inexact characters. People see my Sinatra and know it's still me. I prefer it that way, because you can sometimes really get lost behind those impressions. It's scary. When I learn a character, I literally live with video tapes of him for weeks. My wife becomes a widow. She shoves food in front of me. I go home at one or two in the morning, and right away I put on the tapes. Then it's fast forward, freeze frame, reverse, forward, over and over. Then I make an audio tape of my voice and play it again and again in the car. I watch more video tape at work before I write the piece. About the only thing I don't do is tape the characterization beforehand to see if it's right. I do it cold in dress rehearsal. And through it all, I get to know those people better than anyone. I look into their eyes. I know this sounds bizarre, but somehow I can see that the people I do are OK. Jerry Lewis, when I do the nutty professor. Even Reagan. Of course, I haven't done Nixon yet, so I'm not entirely sure.