There are a few basic techniques that men can use to get things started. First, prepare your partner for pleasure. Caress the insides of her thighs, talk to her softly, massage the muscles around her vulva. Demonstrating on her video "Nina Hartley's Guide to Better Cunnilingus" (800-765-2326), Nina Hartley gently squeezes and kneads the muscles around her partner's vulva like a baker. These muscles are stronger and more pliant than most people realize -- and who thinks to massage them? She reminds guys that the clitoris is not a doorbell. Don't attack it. Instead, be indirect. The clit is extremely sensitive, so when you kiss and lick her labia and other parts of her vulva, the clitoris feels the tremors and responds. If your lover asks for your fingers, don't shove them in deep. Most nerve endings are within two inches of the vaginal opening, so gently but firmly caress that area. No man is born an expert, so it's crucial that women tell you how you're doing and provide specific instructions about what she likes and doesn't like. As Nina Hartley says, "Good pussy eating is a team effort."