PLAYBOY: You play Chloe, the title B in Don’t Trust the B---- in Apartment 23. What’s it like being America’s most famous bitch?
RITTER: People come up to me and call me “the B,” which I find so endearing. They changed the title from Bitch to B----, and I’m glad. At first I wasn’t, because I’m the bitch and it was rad. But now that people come over to me and call me “the B,” I’m relieved. It’s much more adorable to be called “the B” than “You bitch.”
PLAYBOY: Who’s the bitchiest roommate you’ve ever had?
RITTER: When I was modeling I lived with eight to 10 girls in the modeling agency’s two-bedroom apartment, sleeping in bunk beds. It was crazy, but not as crazy as people want it to be. Sure, we’d go out and drink cosmos and dance on tables. But no sex with rappers or cocaine or eating disorders. I worked a lot, and there was one other girl who also worked a lot. She was the queen bee before I came along, and I think she didn’t enjoy that she wasn’t the only one anymore. She fucking hated me. I would play guitar on the patio—not late; we’re talking 8:30 to nine p.m.—and she would tell the agency I was keeping her up. I got in trouble for that. So I put roaches in her bed. You don’t fuck with a girl’s livelihood.
PLAYBOY: Where does a nice girl like you find a bunch of cockroaches?
RITTER: Well, it was New York City. They’re there. I found them with my girlfriend Charity, who was just bad news but in the best possible way. We caught the roaches and put them in the other model’s suitcase too, in hopes she would take them home and infest her house. I’m pretty ashamed of myself. [laughs]
PLAYBOY: You grew up on an actual beef farm in Shickshinny, Pennsylvania, a town of 838 people. Is it true your family wouldn’t let you have a horse and you rode a cow instead?
RITTER: My stepfather called horses “hay burners.” They do nothing. You can’t milk them and you can’t eat them, so we didn’t have them. But I had a calf I raised named Jake. He was so small that when I got him, I could pick him up. We took naps together and snuggled. And then he got big—very big. We put him in the pasture. When I would go hang out with him, I’d pull him over to the side of the fence, hold on to the scruff of his neck and get on him. And he would start walking. People would drive by and take pictures, like, Who is this girl riding a cow?
PLAYBOY: What happened to Jake?
RITTER: I didn’t eat him, if that’s what you’re asking. My neighbors might have, but I didn’t.
PLAYBOY: You were discovered by a modeling scout in a shopping mall when you were 15. What was modeling like for a farm girl from Shickshinny?
RITTER: At my first test shoot, the photographer sprayed me with Pam. They were black-and-white pictures in the dirtiest bathroom you’ve ever seen. It was super heroin chic. I’ve got to say, though, the pictures were dope. Looking back, I’m like, What was I doing? I was 15! That same day, at another test shoot with a Japanese photographer, they put me in a sheer bodysuit. So I have pictures of myself at 15 in a sheer shirt sitting underneath a table. I mean, the pictures are beautiful and artistic, but it’s weird to put your 15-year-old in a job where basically you could see my boobs.
PLAYBOY: Do you regret that now?
RITTER: At the time I didn’t think about it, because kids don’t. They say your brain doesn’t develop fully until you’re 25. When kids do crazy stuff, it’s because they really are crazy. I just wasn’t aware; I had no fear. But I have not one single regret or feeling of resentment, because of where I am now. I have a good head on my shoulders. I learned all my lessons on my own.
PLAYBOY: You appeared nude—only slightly blurred in all the expected places—in the pilot for your show. Was that second nature for you?
RITTER: When I read the script I thought it was the best pilot, the best character I’ve read and unique. I was naked in the pilot. I had a switchblade. I was getting a kid drunk. I was dancing in a rap video. I wasn’t going to find anything flashier, so I was down for it. Then, on the day I was supposed to actually be naked, I was like, Aw, shit. I don’t like to be in my underpants in front of all the crew guys. You catch them looking and you’re like, No! But I got a Mystic Tan, so that made me feel less naked.
PLAYBOY: Does Mystic Tan have some sort of magic power we don’t know about?
RITTER: No, but a good tan is the key to being able to wear a bikini, I think. It makes you feel as if you have clothes on.
PLAYBOY: On the show, Chloe is so legendary that there is a Japanese graphic novel based on her life called Tall Slut No Panties. Is that based on truth?
RITTER: No. I wear underwear, but my biggest fear is that I’ll get locked out of my hotel room when I’m naked. The doors always shut on you. I met somebody who carries a wedge with them to hold the door open because they were so sick of hotel doors closing.