I DON’T think I’ve ever heard a good pickup line at my bar, Alibi Cafe in Providence. Maybe I shouldn’t have said that—now it sounds like a challenge.
ARE DRUNK girls worse than drunk guys? I don’t know. All drunk people love to knock their glasses over, so I’d rather deal with whoever spills the least.
RHODE ISLAND is such a small state that you can’t do anything without everyone else hearing about it.
AT MY last job, my best friend and I had a champagne fight. Because our clothes were soaked, we borrowed shirts from two guys and drove home in our underwear. It’s a good thing we didn’t get pulled over.