I’m a car-audio installer. An instructor at a training conference told me that clitoral resonance is 33 hertz, give or take, depending on the woman’s weight. This means that anything vibrating 33 times per second will cause the clitoris to resonate. Howard Stern made an example of this in Private Parts when he got a woman off by having her sit on a speaker, and just about any woman will respond to a bass note at that frequency if your subwoofer can play that low. Is there any truth to this?
-J.B., Yuma, Arizona
Don’t touch that dial. The idea that 33 Hz is the optimal resonance to get a woman off originated with an experiment performed in 1992 by car-audio consultant Todd Ramsey. While on spring break in Daytona Beach, Ramsey and his buddies spent three days asking women to sit in the front seat of a Honda Accord. The crew then swept the frequencies from high to low on an 18-inch subwoofer, powered by a 1,000-watt amp, in the trunk. The women gave the thumbs-up when the vibrations felt best. Once Ramsey had crunched the numbers for about 100 volunteers, including making adjustments for their self-reported weights, he calculated that the optimal resonance for a woman of 115 to 125 pounds is 33 Hz. Not so coincidentally, he says, that’s about the same resonance as an idling Harley or a spinning washing machine. In 2001 Ramsey wrote about the CR (clitoral resonance) factor in Auto Sound & Security. “I’m still waiting for a call from one of the big automakers,” he says today. One CR disciple is Richie Warren, founder of Fuel records, which produces bass heavy music for car-audio systems. To promote Fuel at auto shows, Warren straps three models across the top of a Dodge Challenger and booms a 33 Hz tone “until they’re coming all over the car.” Ask your partner to sit on your quality subwoofer, hook up your computer to your sound system and sweep through the tones to find her number (the heavier the woman, the lower the frequency). The only downside is that she may leave with your stereo.