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Playboy Interview: Tony Robbins
  • August 13, 2013 : 07:08
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PLAYBOY: How, as a married man, do you handle your sexual attractions?

ROBBINS: When I met Steven Tyler, I asked him what kept him going in the band for 35 years, and he laughed: “Front-row blondes.” Women up front who expose themselves, forget to wear their panties, just crazy shit. In my seminars I could be ugly as hell, but when you have a position of leadership, women will throw themselves at you. But I knew the difference between what the animal and what my soul would be fed by. I look at what I have in my life, and there’s zero comparison.

PLAYBOY: It’s 14 years later. Is the passion alive, or has it gotten boring?

ROBBINS: It’s the furthest thing from boring, and I’m not saying this to brag, because I was a total failure in this aspect for 14 years of my previous marriage. I expected it should just happen. Or if it didn’t, then it wasn’t there. I was just stupid. Now I make it my focus. We both know how to trigger and arouse each other, which is a useful thing, without going into any detail.

PLAYBOY: What do you mean by triggers?

ROBBINS: It might be a body part of your partner’s, something they say, something passionate or playful. Once you’re aroused, desire has a chance to step in, which leads to the sensuality. That allows you to take that desire and fire on it.

PLAYBOY: Do you have sex more than once a month?

ROBBINS: [Laughs] Yeah, that would be a good description. A lot more than that, yes.

PLAYBOY: After 14 years?

ROBBINS: Ask my wife. See what she tells you.

PLAYBOY: So you’re a happy guy.

ROBBINS: The happiest I have ever been. Sage is one of the greatest gifts God’s given me. My whole life is driven by love. It always has been. It’s never been driven by material things—which are just benefits of doing something I loved. When people say money doesn’t matter, it sure as hell does when you’re able to show your mother a beach house and then hand her the keys to it. That was one of the happiest moments of my life.

PLAYBOY: What do the material possessions mean to you? You travel by private plane, own a 525-acre resort in Fiji, plus four other homes including your main residence, a $25 million estate in Palm Beach.

ROBBINS: It would be stupid not to say I’m very grateful for them. But if it all disappeared tomorrow, I’d be fine. At the core, it’s relationships that make people happy. Accomplishments won’t do it. Who you’re connected to is everything. I also have something else, which is a deep sense of meaning.

PLAYBOY: Do you mean your mission?

ROBBINS: Yes. What drives me is seeing people make breakthroughs that reconnect them with real passion.

PLAYBOY: When you witness a transformation, what happens for you personally?

ROBBINS: It’s like something steps into me, and it’s only later that I try to figure out how it happened. I know a huge part of it is grace. I never forget that. I often go backstage and get tearful. To think I could start out as a janitor and wind up making a real difference in people’s lives. [chokes up] I mean, you can see the tears, and I can feel it in my body right now. I know I’m not the answer for everything and everyone, but in my soul I was made to be a person who could help. I’d love to have as much time as possible.

PLAYBOY: But if you died tomorrow?

ROBBINS: I’ve had a blessed life. That’s not to say I didn’t have extreme stress and pain. People I loved didn’t love me. I’ve been told “You have a tumor.” I’ve buried two fathers and a mother. I’ve been in businesses that were on the edge of bankruptcy. And thank God I didn’t give up. Remember, I’m the kid who lived in a house with tinfoil on the windows, shutting out the light. But my passion today is turning that light on.

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read more: Celebrities, interview, playboy interview, issue september 2013

5 comments

  • Rambo
    Rambo
    Tony Robbins is amazing! Much love to Tony and Playboy magazine for doing this interview! ;)
  • Jim Donovan
    Jim Donovan
    Great article. Whatever you think of Tony, his strategies can't be beat. Nice to see he's mellowed and humbled a bit.
  • Terry Schmidt
    Terry Schmidt
    Tony is the real deal. I read his first book UNLIMITED POWER IN 1986, attended his weekend seminar with only 150 people, and realized this was someone I could learn from. So I attended his certification program, became a trainer for him, then a master trainer, and was his first strategic planner. He is passionately brilliant - we met at 5 pm one day to go over my strategic planning presentation, and that generated a spark of innovation that had us up till 3 am creating a whole new model for personal strategic planning! The next day he was up at 7 am for a full schedule while I slept till noon! What I learned from Tony has made me a much better person -- as it has for millions of others.
  • Jeff Marx
    Jeff Marx
    Tony is amazing. I went to his "Date With Destiny" seminar a few years ago after I'd had a devastating personal setback which threw me for a serious loop, to the extent that I was seriously walking through my life secretly wishing I'd accidentally get hit by a bus. Tony was the first one to teach me about meaning - that it's not the events that happen in your life, it's what they mean to you and how you choose to respond to them (which is always within your own control) - once I fully, deeply understood this, it totally blew my mind and truly changed the way I think. He really knows how to help people get themselves off auto-pilot and start consciously taking charge of their own beliefs and emotions and get what they want from life. There's nobody on earth who has had a deeper effect on my emotional health and happiness. He's a total genius and I'll be forever grateful to him.
  • Besski Livius
    Besski Livius
    Very inspiring article. Reading his personal story, with all these personal details, helps me believe that it's possible. It's possible to do what ever I set my mind to, just like he did. And he's just another human being like all of us. The most important idea I picked up from this interview is "having a mission" and following it, or a Campbell says "Follow Your Bliss". So, 10 minutes well spent reading this article. It's first time I read an article on playboy.com and sure enough won't be the last.
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