Samantha meets an endowed dildo model who gives her the real thing. Afterward, the model presents her with two foot-long rubber replicas of his dong, which she re-gifts to Carrie and Miranda. Over brunch at the Standard in LA, Miranda gasps that nobody needs a dildo that big, since the average vagina is but five inches deep. "To me, the mark of a good penis is width," she testifies. Samantha gives that an amen.

What they're telling us:
The length of your schlong really isn't the dealbreaker. With the average vagina being five inches from lips to cervix and the average dick being about 5.5 inches from base to tip, the law of average says that most guys will be able to fill most girls' wishes. However, circumference counts for more than the gals let on.

Follow-through:
Unless your little friend's under five inches tall, she'll scream when she rides that ride. Sadly, no amount of exercise will bulk up your love muscle, so if you don't have the mass, make up for it with stamina and form.