AND...ACTION!

Guys shouldn't be afraid to tell their girlfriends or wives about their fantasies. Men are worried a woman will think, Oh my God, that's disgusting! It's okay to tell your woman, "I want to watch porn and come on your face." You'll probably be surprised by her reaction. She'll most likely prefer to try something kinky rather than have you stray and cheat. Recently I acted out one of my man's fantasies. He handed me a script and told me to read it and meet him at a bar later that night. The script detailed what he wanted me to wear and my character's name. I walked into the pool hall, sat down and had a drink by myself. Then I pretended to recognize him -- as a porn star, of course! We started talking and playing pool and continued the act. Then he kissed me over the pool table, and it felt as if I'd never been kissed before. We called each other by our characters' names, and when we were done we finally broke out laughing. I said, "That was so much fun."

POP-UP VIDEO

The next time we role-play, I'm going to dress up in the red bathing suit I used to wear on Baywatch. I'll pretend he's drowning and pull him out of the water. When the mouth-to-mouth doesn't work, I'll realize that the only way to resuscitate him will be to jump on and ride him. If you live far away from your lover, you should buy her a video camera. That way she can make sexy tapes of herself and mail them to you, and when you visit her, you can shoot yourselves having sex and then watch it when you're alone. Just make sure she's not the type of person who would post videos on the Internet if you broke up. Phone sex is great too. Sometimes women feel more comfortable saying dirty things to you over the phone than they would in person.