QUESTIONS OF THE WEEK - January 11, 2007

Robert, Pensacola FL:

I am not married but want to buy a house with my girlfriend and share expenses while we live together. What can I do to protect myself in the event we break up?

The Lawyer of Love:

Besides wearing a steel-plated cup, you should consult with a family law lawyer before you purchase the house. The key question is whether your particular state favors cohabitation agreements so that the agreement will serve to protect you rather than causing additional litigation.

A properly drafted cohabitation agreement is a contractual device which allows non-married couples who are living together to plan some of the following: (1) the sharing of living expenses during the course of the relationship; (2) the division of joint property upon termination of the relationship; and (3) the retention of your own separate property acquired prior to, and after, the execution of the agreement.

Keep in mind that since these agreements are relatively novel in practice, they are tricky to draft properly. You need to find a skilled and creative family law specialist who also understands the tax ramifications of this type of arrangement. If all else fails, save your money and buy the house by yourself. At that point, whatever you do, do not add her name on the title no matter how good she looks or how well she sucks the chrome off your bumpers.

Jake, Providence RI:

What is alimony or maintenance? Is there a difference?

The Lawyer of Love:

It's the Court's version of making you pay welfare to your wife instead of the government. Seriously, maintenance -- formerly known as alimony -- is spousal support paid to a spouse. In the simplest form, it is awarded to spouses who are in need of support from a spouse who can afford to pay it. It typically applies in situations where one spouse has been out of the workforce and raising the children. In some cases, it may be favorable to pay maintenance rather than to give a larger cash property settlement because maintenance is tax deductible to the payor and taxable to the payee. However, a divorce attorney must be consulted because the rules applying to maintenance and the types of alimony vary from state to state and are not uniform.

Eric, Los Angeles CA:

I'm currently going through a divorce and I think my assigned judge is favoring my wife way too much. Is there any way I can switch judges?

The Lawyer of Love:

In some states, if it is prior to trial and the Judge has not ruled or entered a court order relating to an important issue in your case, you may change the Judge without stating a reason. However, if the Judge has already made a material ruling in your case, you would have show the Judge is prejudiced against you. This sounds easy in theory but in practice, prejudice is much more than a Judge favoring your wife and extremely difficult to prove. Moreover, if you file a motion alleging the Judge is biased and you lose, you must return to the Judge you accused of being unfair. So unless you have photos of your wife banging the Judge in his chambers, you probably do not have a prayer to show bias.