If you were born between the years 1981 to 1996, there’s a good chance you worshiped the ocean’s most beloved fry cook. To many, Spongebob Squarepants is what Jerry Lewis or Kurt Cobain was to older generations, and his show is one of the most iconic of the early ‘00s era. Because of his omnipresence in the popular culture since his debut in 1999, fast-food giant Wendy’s conceived a meal honoring Squarepants’ 25th year on TV with the Krabby Patty Kollab Meal. But is this meal worth slogging through long drive-thru lines?
What Is the Wendy’s Spongebob Squarepants Krabby Patty Kollab Meal?
For the few of you out there who aren’t Sponge-pilled, Krabby Patties are dished out on the daily by Spongebob at the Krusty Krab, which is Bikini Bottom’s most popular burger joint. Wendy’s Krabby Patty Kollab isn’t just another cynical “celeb meal” that a couple of its rivals trotted out in recent years. They actually made a new product instead of repurposing stuff that was already on the menu. Here’s what comes in the Kollab Meal:
- Krabby Patty Kollab Burger: A quarter pound burger topped with two slices of American cheese, lettuce, tomato, pickles, onions, and a “top-secret Krabby Kollab sauce,” all on a premium bun.
- Pineapple Under the Sea Frosty: Wendy’s Vanilla Frosty swirled with a yellow mango and pineapple “flavored” swirl.
- Fries: Wendy’s fries. Perfectly serviceable.
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Is the Wendy’s Spongebob Squarepants Krabby Patty Kollab Meal Worth It?
Actually Securing the Meal
Here’s a tip. If you’re anything like me (stunted Millennial, sort of ashamed he’s excited about trying a meal from a cartoon he loves), you can save yourself a little shame by ordering your meal through the Wendy’s app. This saves you from having to utter the words “One Krabby Patty Meal, please” out loud to another adult.
Pineapple Under the Sea Frosty
It’s early Fall in Northern California, which means it’s 90 degrees outside. The Pineapple Under the Sea Frosty would not survive the 10 minute drive home. After snapping a quick photo I figured it would be prudent to have dessert first. The swirl wasn’t very pronounced here like in all the promo material. But the neon yellow pineapple/mango sludge mixed with Vanilla Frosty was nothing short of divine. Something like a tropical creamsicle. Much of it sunk to the bottom, which I carefully mixed back into the frozen dessert. I had planned to only eat half, and freeze the rest for later. But it didn’t survive the car ride.
Krabby Patty Kollab Burger
The burger—let’s not kid ourselves—is a basic Wendy’s burger with “special sauce.” One of my long-held fast-food conspiracy theories (aside from McDonald’s Sprite being complete hokum) is that every single orangey-pink burger sauce is the same. Sure, the ketchup, mayo, and chopped pickle quotient can deviate from chain to chain, but it all turns into Thousand Island in your mouth. Before unwrapping the burger, I did what my spouse and I always do at dinnertime: put on something to watch. We put on my favorite episode, Season three’s “Krusty Krab Training Video.”
The first bite made me laugh. A visceral reaction that I only do when I see something funny, am being yelled at, or am genuinely surprised. The Krabby Patty Kollab Burger tasted like an In-N-Out Burger. No, not exactly. And frankly, not as good. But it was a fair facsimile. If you’ve ever wanted to try America’s Best Regional Burger served under the glow of neon trees, this burger will get you close.
Final Thoughts
Considering everything from the early ’00s making a resurgence, from Linkin Park to Yu-Gi-Oh, this Spongebob Squarepants-style meal is a pretty successful attempt at tapping into that new millennium nostalgia. I came away happy from the experience, and there’s a good chance I’ll enjoy the Kollab Meal at least once more before the promotion ends.
What I truly loved about this Spongebob Squarepants x Wendy’s collaboration was what it didn’t do. There was no unnecessary packaging. No cheap plastic toy destined for a land fill. And most of all, there wasn’t a cynical markup. I bought two meals and only spent a little over $20—a veritable steal in today’s current fast food landscape.
I joked for a month with friends, colleagues, and enemies that the Krusty Krab Kollab meal would “heal me,” as the popular meme says. And I’m happy to report that it kind of, sort of did. It’s difficult to be cynical when you’re eating a cartoon hamburger.
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