Ribald Classic: Epigrams From Martial
July, 1977
Numero UnoAll Rome admires and hums my verses--look!That fellow down the street peeks at mybookAnd curses, reddens, rants and stamps hisfeet,Infuriated--I find such praises sweet.CherryYou say Thais is a virgin? Where? Between her toes?No, between her eyes.To SextusYou claim at beautiful women comejust by looking at you.I think they go.Grocer's DaughterMarulla measures men's erectionsBefore and after, noting their deflectionsOn the scales when they're shrunken,limp and numb.And still she cheats....
