Tumblebrush

January, 1979

Howard CruseSalyewtashuns, equinous quadrewped! (Hic!) emboldened as I am by the salubrious ministrashuns of Vintage Firewater, might I propose as balm for my insurgent Hornyness an unconvenshunal Carnal Alliance between Thyself and me?I feer I must Dekline yer titillating propozishun dew to the following exigencies: (a)The ungainly expendichur of time which wood be required to evaluate yer Professhunal History, credit references and College Bored Skoars prior to determinashun of yer Fitness as...