The Stupor Bowl

February, 1985

If the Super Bowl were a sitcom, it would have been canceled years ago. The zebras aren't funny. Not funny enough, at least, to justify all those flags they throw that make your money sprout wings and challenge the Goodyear Blimp to a swirling dogfight. And the players haven't been any help. More often than not, one team shows up looking overcoached and undermedicated--or doesn't show up at all. Same thing would've happened if the Super Bowl had been an adventure series: canceled. The car chases...