Your bag is empty.
Hello—you’ve just met the biggest fan of content ever! I love consuming content from a variety of content-delivery mediums. I love written content; that one’s my favorite, probably. But I also like video content. Podcast content too. I can’t decide! As long as it’s an effective content strategy, I’m hooked!
I really love content that interacts meaningfully with my demographic group—when relevant content takes me on an emotional journey, starting with increased brand awareness and culminating in a positive end-user experience that leaves someone statistically similar to my age, race, sex, income level, years of college education and credit card ownership with a rich, satisfied feeling of elevated brand interest. I want a brand interaction I’ll never forget!
The other day I saw this amazing content in my feed. It beautifully took up the space between the advertorials and pop-ups and commercial messages. It might have been integrated branded content, or maybe it was a celebrity-endorsed sponsored post. Whatever it was, it was awesome, because content is just the best!
Maybe someday the content creators will figure out a way to inject content directly into my mind. Then I won’t have to think at all!
I recently read this piece in the opinion-mercial section of the newspaper. Talk about a high content-differentiation factor! This was content guaranteed to have excellent ROI for the marketing professional who served it. I was impressed! I always make it a point to contribute to good open rates and click-throughs. I just want to give a little back to the content I love so much!
On a more serious note, content doesn’t just infotain me; it keeps me up to date on the issues I care about. I follow important events like politics. My content platforms know all my opinion data and send me the best content tailored to what I think, which means it’s true!
Did I tell you I have a poster of content in my bedroom? I love going to sleep looking at content on my wall!
Oddly, I never dream. My nights are just a dark abyss with no content.
We’re living in the Golden Age of content. Nowadays, there’s so much content on cable TV and in theaters and on all those great OTT platforms—I can’t possibly consume it all, but I wish I could! Maybe someday the content creators will figure out a way to inject content directly into my mind. Then I won’t have to think at all! My most basic responses to sensory input will be replaced with content notifications. Wouldn’t that be amazing? Ding! Time for content!
However, as a responsible consumer of content, I believe it’s important to protect my content from hackers. If they invent that content-plugged-into-your-brain thing I mentioned, I would hate to have my brain hacked! Then people could make me believe anything they wanted, and that would be terrible!
At least now I control my own thoughts. And you know what I’m thinking? I just love content!
This article appears in the Winter 2019 PLAYBOY.